Friend of mine Diesel Dave, was a UPS 7.5 tonner driver who was always stricken by bad luck.
On the M1, middle lane, he was in collision with a wheelbarrow!
In my previous job I used to travel the country installing temporary networks for events.
On the way to one job we were thundering along the M4 in lane 2 in the van; I looking idly out the window, the driver opening a sandwich at 70mph.
Upon hearing "FUCK ME" and becoming rapidly aware of a BLT disintegrating against the dashboard I looked up to see an upended wheelbarrow sat in our path. We served into lane 1, overcorrected back into lane 2, then back into lane 1. Fair play he didn't hit the barrow, and claims he knew there was room in lane 1 for his emergency avoidance, but we had to stop at the next services so he could change his strides.
On another occasion we were returning to base, and were on the local roads. On exiting a roundabout I noticed we were getting closer and closer to the curb, which we then hit. I turned and looked at the (same bloke) driver, who was bent down pulling his socks up.
I didn't let him drive after that.
LAST OWNER WAS SON OF A BANKER
I put my trousers on, have a cup of tea and I think about leaving the house
It's got nothing to do with Vorsprung durch technique, you know?