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Less modern laguna.. For SALE! Terrible price, £200, you have until monday at 9am to stake a claim!


beko1987

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Whilst having a prod around at lunchtime with some baby wipes to idly get the filth off some of the plastics I remembered the 12v socket in the armrest still doesnt work. So I had a poke and managed to get the socket out, and had a swap with the 2 12v sockets I liberated from YT55 before it went, that used to work. No dice

 

Then I had the magnificent brainwave to check the fuses, and lo and behold a 15a fuse was blown (yes I've had the thing since November and have not checked the fuses). There was only a 20a in the spares so I lobbed that in. Mmmm, still no voltage. Popped the original socket back in and tadah! It works! As now does the 12v socket for the back seats! So now I can have my phone charger plugged in hidden away with the cable poking out of the side, rather than sticking out the dash and getting in the way of the gear lever.

 

I also think (and I'm touching my wooden desk here) that that's everything electrical (bar the occasional injector fault which at this very exact moment is fine) working, is that a record?

 

Ah no wait, the rear windows dont work. Still dont care as much about those so we are at 99% electrically perfect! Laguna normality restored.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well that was fun! Was like working in an oven, I'd pick up tools and they would be red hot, but the inner tie rods, track rod ends and drop links are done!

 

Few things I noticed:

 

The proper inner tie rod removal tool doesn't fit around the anti roll bar, so water pump pliers got used again

 

The supplied generic gaitors were shit, so I cut the new one and the old one in half, and inserted one inside the other (their the same diameter, and the ridges fit inside each other really tightly) then a drop of glue around the join and cable tied on. Will check it in a few weeks, and if by a miracle the car is still with me/alive come the next mot I'll worry about it then

 

Had a shit my pants moment on the first test drive, went to do a 3 point turn to lock to lock the steering and got a horrible scary grinding noise. Limped home (was only in the next street) and upon removing the wheels realised I'd put the track rod ends on the wrong sides, so the wheels have scraped the inside edge and taken the weights off... Will see how that goes on Tuesday at 70mph...swapped round though and all good

 

Steering wheel is a bit on the cock now, but it drives straight so will see if it's livable with until next weekend and pop to national tyres with their voucher for cheap tracking.

 

Somethings improved though, the steering no longer wobbles with bumps, nor is there a knocking noise from the front end, but I wasn't going fast so cant comment too much, got up to 50 briefly on the bypass but not for many seconds before I had to turn back into the other end of our estate.

 

Dead now, having a cup of coffee then a long shower!

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Still is hot today!

 

Popped to the shops for milk this morning. Did think of going to the car boot or something but I can't afford it, plus the last thing I need is another flipping hoover! So I went the long way to the co-op. And my god it's transformed! Even bigger a transformation than the blue laguna was! The steering no longer shakes about with bumps, next to no noise from the front end on all but the largest holes, steering is alot more direct,and there's less slop! Just got to limp it through this week and I'll get the tracking done as the wheel is on the slight piss now, and it wanders to the left but I've had worse, if it wasn't for the 1000 mile shitefest trip I'd probably not bother, but should probably get it done for then.

 

Did hear the half torn off wheel weight exit stage left on the way though, will cautiously get to 80 tomorrow and see what the crack is, hoping it is fine as I'll need front tyres later in the year, so if it can hang on until then I get them balanced for free*

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Yep, that was interesting! Kept trying to steer left alot over 50, plus tyre squeal around corners that have never had tyre squeal before even at higher speeds! Dropped it straight into the tyre place by work, will use some shitefest money, it's only £10 more than national tyres even with a code anyway!

 

The guy looked elated when I said what I'd replaced, so hopefully it'll be ready soon, they looked quiet

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Tracking done! Ended up in a 20 minute conversation with a guy who had a Ferrari in for tyres and the bloke who ran the place about our favourite orl modernzz r shit (tyre place matey tried to help out a friend with brake pads on a volvo xc60 on Saturday and failed because it needed a computer to wind the pistons back in.) Bit of banter with the Ferrari owner who was in jeans and a shirt about how my car cost half what one tyre cost but I know which id rather drive and I was away, down the road, in a straight line, with no pull to any direction!

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  • 4 weeks later...

I've done some pre shitefest fettling!

 

First up was the pipe I may have broken a while ago, that comes off the main turbo air intake pipe. So I had it all out

 

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Worryingly the jubilee clip that holds the pipe onto the actual turbo was very loose, the pipe just pulled off so I'm hoping there's some improvement there at the very least! Gave it all a good clean off to get the caked on oil off whilst it was out. It sits under here, but access was good once I was knelt ontop of the engine

 

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Six_Cylinder let me pinch a bit of rubber hose from his dead 75, so I found that out, and dismantled my previous in-situ bodge job fix with brown paper tape, which really was shit

 

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But that wasn't the right size. So I got the hose out, and cut a bit off! It slid over the first bit a treat, then after I cut the broken remains of the flange off the other pipe it slid into there a treat too! It's as if Hozelok knew!

 

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Bound it all tightly in electrical tape just to be safe and re-fitted it all!

 

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And that was about it! Took a few connectors off and sprayed contact cleaner about, cable tied a few cables up, had to move the relay tray out the way to re-fit the air box lid, gave the MAF a little clean off just in case and took Eva into town for some milk to test it, and MY GOD it's faster! It moves forward when the turbo kicks in much better now!  I gained 0.4mpg too despite blazzing it about, which is promising

 

The car rewarded me by ticking over to 120,000 miles as we got to Sainsbury's

 

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So I rewarded myself by buying some beer

 

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I was going to give it a good vacuum out, but sat here typing this it's very peaceful at home, next door is out in the garden having lunch, the girl 2 doors up has their baby out playing in the garden so I might sack that idea off until later... Plus Charlie is asleep and fuck waking that up now...

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  • 3 weeks later...

I knew I recognised this reg plate! You followed me down the M40 before you pulled off at the bottom of Stokenchurch hill. I gave you a flash of the hazards but appreciate it's quite an anonymous car I drive.

 

Also, the simple fact it was a BMW in the inside lane with working indicators was possibly enough to convince you it was all a dream.

 

It's quite sad when I see a car on the motorway and think "Hmmmm, FV51 on a Laguna.... It's Beko!"

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I knew I recognised this reg plate! You followed me down the M40 before you pulled off at the bottom of Stokenchurch hill. I gave you a flash of the hazards but appreciate it's quite an anonymous car I drive.

 

Also, the simple fact it was a BMW in the inside lane with working indicators was possibly enough to convince you it was all a dream.

 

It's quite sad when I see a car on the motorway and think "Hmmmm, FV51 on a Laguna.... It's Beko!"

Ha did I really, nice! Yea I wouldn't have noticed you as braking late on the slip so as not to be braking on the inside lane makes the car shake a bit...

 

Hi!

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  • 2 months later...

I had a flush of wanting to do something today, and the children were out/going out, so I pulled the Gooner around into the workshop

 

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opened the doors

 

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And got the vacuum out

 

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Charlie helped for a bit before he went out

 

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And I spent a few hours mucking the thing out

 

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etc. Also got busy with the g101 and some cloths and scrubbed the plastics down which I've never really done before

 

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All good stuff, and it smells less like a toilet inside now!

 

Buoyed with this success, I had a look at the non working horn. Steering wheel cowling off, I had the indicator stalk off, as a common fix apparently is the contacts under there.. These were fine, and fixed nothing. I then dug out the stalk I saved from the old gooner which I have never really fitted as I prefer non cancelling indicators, again, nothing...

 

It then started to rain so I packed up, but I have 2 choices now:

 

Choice 1 is taking the bumper off and look at the horns themselves. I did peek at the bottom one, after jacking up the corner and pulling the splash guard back, and it looked fine, the connector was dry and it all looked quite clean. I did wonder if it was happening with water being splashed up etc, then I remembered it's not rained properly for months here, and the bit of rain we have had I've not really driven in!

 

Choice 2 is to take the steering wheel and bastard airbag off, and have a look at the clock spring, again another common issue, although apparently unlike the xantia, it doesn't break up internally, but the floating contacts flatten out over time, which might explain why it does sometimes work...

 

TBH I do have an option 3 which is once the windscreen is replaced, if it randomly starts to work get it MOT'd 3 months early and then just worry about it next year!

 

I've reached a bit of a plateu with this now. It's still being a car fine, averaging 54mpg, its a comfy, warm and dry place to sit, however the clutch is still very infrequently not coming fully up (although I can count on one hand how many times its happened, so not fully full of doom about that yet), and the engine sounds quite rattly from the belt area especially when cold. If the MOT ran out in April I would be OK as I get my bonus from work in March, so could just buy another car, but the MOT is out in Jan. So the windscreen is getting replaced after payday because it's got a fucking big crack now, and I noticed today that the rain is getting into the crack, and it wont last 5 minutes when it gets frosty. Once thats done, and the horn works it'll just be driven! Back brakes squeal when reversing quite frequently, usually as I reverse onto mums drive or my parking space after a 40 minute drive home from work. As this only happens when going backwards, which I rarely do, I'm ignoring it for now. The discs are not the cleanest, but it brakes good and straight, so it'll be fine! When it starts doing it going forward I'll worry

 

Everything is OK on it, brakes are good, tyres are good, lights are good etc, so it should pass the test OK. Then when I get my bonus, I'll either buy another car, or put the money in an envelope and give it to my mum and see how long the gooner lasts. Either way, it's going full bangernomics unless something silly fails, although if I get the horn working I'll give it an oil change, it's been about 10k since the last one.

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That is a fine option actually, even if it was just to test that the bloody horns work! I'll see if I can work it what wires I need! I did ask on the gooner Facebook group but haven't had a response yet. Wondering if wires to a switch on the contacts behind the stalk would do it? Or cause a fully insured accidental fire?

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That is a fine option actually, even if it was just to test that the bloody horns work! I'll see if I can work it what wires I need! I did ask on the gooner Facebook group but haven't had a response yet. Wondering if wires to a switch on the contacts behind the stalk would do it? Or cause a fully insured accidental fire?

Just wire in a cheap horn on a separate relay and switch and put a dymo label on the dash saying “horn”

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Just wire in a cheap horn on a separate relay and switch and put a dymo label on the dash saying “horn”

Sounds almost as much hassle as investigating what's there... It works occasionally, so can't be anything too scary*...

 

Ill give it a bash anyway, if either the steering wheel side or horn side yields nothing then yes, I'll wire something new in!

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If you think it's the wheel end of things, and assuming it's an earth switched system like most horns. It should be quite* easy to earth the feed wire from a connector under the column to see if that makes the horn work. Then either fix it or bodge it with another switch.

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It's a straight 50/50 chance. Everything I've read is either the horn units themselves or the steering wheel.

 

I'm assuming the 2 contacts that the indicator stalk connect to is a live or earth feed, which is connected with the push of the horn button. Kicking myself a bit for not trying it whilst I had it apart but it started twatting down with rain and I got the washing in, so I think I'll try bridging those and seeing what happens and go from there

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Today I said goodbye to

 

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And hello to a hole

 

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Mum says it's finished now, and the chap let me grab the birds nest of shit out that was under the scuttle.

 

I also tipped some magic potion in

 

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Because although I've seen no visible smoke when I've caned it to check, the back corner by the exhaust is black, I've been wafting a bit too much I think!

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