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Mr_SPudz ASTONISHING SHITE SPOT

Les Dennis

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147 replies to this topic

#91 OFFLINE   phil_lihp

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Posted 26 February 2017 - 06:30 PM

It's deteriorated quite a lot in the last 8 years - didn't look too bad in 2009, certainly looks a lot straighter and with more ground clearance.  

 

cortina.png


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#92 OFFLINE   worldofceri

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Posted 26 February 2017 - 06:42 PM

Looks worse to me, if anything.

 

cortina_zpscrgfaoxk.jpg


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135264.png 797844.png 865455.png
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#93 OFFLINE   cunnyfunt

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Posted 26 February 2017 - 10:24 PM

Out fucking standing.



#94 OFFLINE   Station

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 02:11 PM

It should be a legal requirement as part of Autoshite membership you get that Cortina tattooed on your forearm.


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#95 OFFLINE   overrun

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 02:37 PM

It should be a legal requirement as part of Autoshite membership you get that Cortina tattooed on your forearm.

 

You first, mate.


  • Cavcraft likes this

Safe now. Everything's lead lined.

 

 


#96 OFFLINE   mercrocker

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 07:03 PM

Some tattooists I have known you could have given them a brochure of a Ford Granada to copy and it would come out like that Cortina...


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#97 OFFLINE   sierraman

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 07:16 PM

Did they ever catch all the Brinks Mat robbers?


Most of them. 2 in the first few days.

#98 OFFLINE   sierraman

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 07:22 PM

I'd love to see what excessive welding looks like. I can't believe it's actually tested. By rights it should fail on the sight of the back of the car sagging like that...

#99 OFFLINE   Breadvan72

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 08:48 PM

It should be a legal requirement as part of Autoshite membership you get that Cortina tattooed on your forearm.

 

I have already got a tattoo of the Cortina, but it's not on my arm.  


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#100 OFFLINE   twosmoke300

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 08:49 PM

Has it got the correct droop at the end ?
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One of the funniest things ive read on here - RIP Dave

 

Quote

 

Brilliant... late in for lunch I fired up an off-brand pot noodle and while carrying it to the lounge successfully spilled it all over myself, burned the piss out of my hand, soaked my phone with the juice, soaked a load of expense receipts I was also carrying and it hit the hall floor and just fucking exploded....it was literally dripping from the ceiling in my newly decorated hallway. The obvious and considered reaction was to throw an immediate, massive paddy and boot the fucker down the hall while screaming, which has made the whole scenario about 18 times worse.


#101 OFFLINE   BorniteIdentity

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 08:53 PM

Has anyone put my name and telephone number under his wipers yet?

If not, why not?
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#102 OFFLINE   bub2006

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Posted 27 February 2017 - 10:05 PM

Pm me the details and I'll do it in the morning!

#103 OFFLINE   Station

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 12:47 AM

Has anyone put my name and telephone number under his wipers yet?

If not, why not?


Do you own a scrap yard?

#104 OFFLINE   BorniteIdentity

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 07:51 AM

Do you own a scrap yard?

 

I own a Ford Sierra Base - so yes.


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#105 OFFLINE   Bren

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 08:43 AM

Thre only car I have ever seen that looks like it has suffered a rectal prolapse.
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#106 OFFLINE   Breadvan72

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 09:49 AM

Has it got the correct droop at the end ?

 

 

Rubbish tattoo bloke: I told him I wanted it to look like a Granada stretch limousine, but he's made it look like a Mk1 Fiesta.


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#107 OFFLINE   Parky

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 10:59 AM

I look forward to BorniteIdentity buying this!

Come on, we all know it's gonna happen!

#108 OFFLINE   bub2006

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 11:10 AM

If bornite had sent me a pm id have left his number on it by now!

#109 OFFLINE   BorniteIdentity

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 08:38 PM

I reckon he's more likely to sell a teste than this car. Surely it's now beyond "one of the family" (!)

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#110 OFFLINE   Mr_Bo11ox

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 11:16 PM

What would you do with it? Theres no way you could use it for getting around in. You'd have to start fettling it, which would immediately ruin its appeal. It needs just preserving in a museum as-is.


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#111 OFFLINE   SiC

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Posted 28 February 2017 - 11:18 PM

I reckon you could make a decent earning as one of those cars that gets rented out for TV/films as a prop.
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#112 OFFLINE   garethj

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Posted 01 March 2017 - 06:47 AM

Just outside Cardiff is the Welsh folk museum, they've done a great job of finding old buildings around Wales and rebuilding them brick by brick on the spacious museum grounds.  There are buildings throughout the ages and of all kinds too, many of them are decorated and furnished as they would have been at the time so you can go into a farm from the 1850s, a hardware shop from the 1920s and there's even a terraced row of miners cottages with each one furnished 20 years later than the one next door.

 

That's the kind of place where you could have a rusty old Cortina outside, preferably supported on one side with a few bricks and a mannequin underneath with a stick welder.  Have a 20 gallon drum of underseal propped up against the shed / outside toilet for some set dressing.


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#113 OFFLINE   bub2006

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Posted 01 March 2017 - 10:49 AM

I reckon he's more likely to sell a teste than this car. Surely it's now beyond "one of the family" (!)

That's true but you never know! It honestly looks too far gone to be saved though.

#114 OFFLINE   twosmoke300

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Posted 01 March 2017 - 08:27 PM

At least we know where the first Navara prototype chassis is !
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One of the funniest things ive read on here - RIP Dave

 

Quote

 

Brilliant... late in for lunch I fired up an off-brand pot noodle and while carrying it to the lounge successfully spilled it all over myself, burned the piss out of my hand, soaked my phone with the juice, soaked a load of expense receipts I was also carrying and it hit the hall floor and just fucking exploded....it was literally dripping from the ceiling in my newly decorated hallway. The obvious and considered reaction was to throw an immediate, massive paddy and boot the fucker down the hall while screaming, which has made the whole scenario about 18 times worse.


#115 OFFLINE   sierraman

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Posted 16 September 2017 - 06:14 PM

Thread resurrection...

I've noticed the test has run out on this and it's SORNed. Please tell me it hasn't been scrapped?

#116 OFFLINE   Split_Pin

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Posted 16 September 2017 - 06:21 PM

I'm not normally bothered about banger racing but it would be a shame if this was it's fate.
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#117 OFFLINE   sierraman

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Posted 17 September 2017 - 07:08 AM

Says SORN but don't know whether that means it's sat in a shed or if it's been scrapped. Agreed, it would be a travesty if some fool with no teeth has bought it to bomb round the track. The fact it's been kept on the road for all these years in such bad condition, I'd like to think it kept going.

Doesn't Bub live out that way? He might know it's fate?

#118 OFFLINE   Lacquer Peel

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Posted 17 September 2017 - 07:26 AM

If a car has been legitimately scrapped it should disappear off the system
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#119 OFFLINE   Angrydicky

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Posted 17 September 2017 - 07:36 AM

It's actually sat in a field with three or four other MK4/5 estates not far from where it used to be parked. Still belongs to the same owner, it's just become too rotten to MoT any more so has been put out to pasture, as home for the feral cats in the area! Well according to a post I saw on facebook anyway.


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#120 OFFLINE   sierraman

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Posted 17 September 2017 - 07:46 AM

Any pics of this?

If he waits another 3 year he should be able to crack on with using it again.
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