Project REB's Wonderful World Of DERV - MavisNotMavis Lives

[Supernaut]

You fucking dolt!

[reb]

You fucking dolt!

In my defence at the time I actually bought it I didn't realise how knackered the Golf was. And I was also looking at early S40s, which would all be new enough, but couldn't resist the temptation of a 2.5l 5 pot engine!

 

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[reb]

Stop start traffic at work and some overly exuberant use of the loud pedal while on a late night drive a happy wallet does not make.

 

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[reb]

Bang on two months in to Volvo ownership, I've done something silly like 5000 miles in it (maybe closer to 6000, I'm not sure, I reset the trip a week after I got it). Other than a couple of small niggles it's had no problems and has only FTP once when the fuel relay had a wobbly.

It's very civilized indeed, at idle there's not much to tell you it's running if you're standing outside, quieter than most modern cars I'd say. Definitely an improvement over my tractory diesels.

The interior is spacious and comfortable, and can actually accommodate my lanky frame without having my knees shoved up into the dash, something even the Golf struggled with. The boot swallows up the various shit I feel the need to carry with ease, and without doing the hatchback thing of showing everyone what's in the boot obviously.

 

Gets a fair bit of attention too, admittedly mostly "is that a T5 m8?".

 

Most importantly, nobody suspects the Volvo. A double edged sword admittedly. People really don't expect it to be being driven by a scruffy 21 year old. I get people overtaking me early out of speed limits, only to get stuck behind them at 50 a few seconds later, I assume because Volvo. It does raise a lot less suspicion driving odd places at odd times than the golf, which even though fairly standard had an air of asbo about it. I'm looking forward to the inevetable random drink drive stops that come with working late over christmas, I'm not sure they'll believe I didn't nick it.

 

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[eddyramrod]

Let us know if they've got a camera crew with them and we'll watch out for you in the next series of Police Interceptors!

[reb]

Let us know if they've got a camera crew with them and we'll watch out for you in the next series of Police Interceptors!

I'll make sure I'm wearing my skull balaclava for extra drama for them.

 

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[Supernaut]

28.7 mpg?

 

Not bad. My Mondeo is worse.

[reb]

Yesterday I did some minor servicing on the Volvo. Oil and filter first, which would have gone much smoother if I hadn't had to batter a screwdriver through the old filter to get it off. Two worrying observations were made of the oil exiting the engine, firstly it seemed a bit black and thin for being relatively new, but also there was a fairly significant amount less than there should have been. I knew it was leaking/burning oil somewhere, probably the PCV system needing replaced, and had been keeping an eye on it but 3.5L came out and 5.3L went in.

ECP didn't have any air filters in stock and the one present seems clean enough.

Next on my inspection list was the fuel filter, which *should* only be a couple of years old whether the age or the mileage was being used to determine servicing. Either way, it appeared to be original to the car and there's no way the bolt holding the mounting strap had shifted in 23 years. Of course having sucessfully changed the oil without getting any on my face it was fate that I'd get petrol in my face instead. The new filter went in with absolutely no drama at all, leaving me wondering why it had been ignored for so long.

While I was at it I put a new pair of wipers on and a set of Nightbreakers in the low beams because ECP only had one pair in stock.

On a run out to the nearest motorway (which is quite far away) it felt a decent amount smoother and effortlessly averaged 40mpg, which is higher than it usually would on the same run. It's now sitting around 35mpg.

£50 and an hour or so is worth it in my mind, I spend most of my waking hours driving the bloody thing so I may as well look after it.

 

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[320touring]

Sounds more successful than RML2345's experience getting the oil filter off his 850- that was new sump time

[reb]

Sounds more successful than RML2345's experience getting the oil filter off his 850- that was new sump time

I can see how. Access to it is both very easy but at the same time there's a lot of shit in the way.

 

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[320touring]

If only there was a tool for removing the oil filter.

Were you working at the time?

[reb]

Minor ftp (seems to have resolved itself) has revealed courtesy of some passing police officers that it is still showing as insured by the previous owner. They were satisfied with my documentation, and didn't seem too bothered by the metal number plates which is a bonus.

 

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[CreepingJesus]

The only two times my V70 showed decent economy were stupidly long motorway runs, where it gave about 40. It was virtually immovable from 29mpg otherwise. The T5 was virtually identical too.

My benchmark in that respect were my old two litre petrol Passats, which would average 40 easily.

[reb]

The only two times my V70 showed decent economy were stupidly long motorway runs, where it gave about 40. It was virtually immovable from 29mpg otherwise. The T5 was virtually identical too.

My benchmark in that respect were my old two litre petrol Passats, which would average 40 easily.

I can easily get 40 out of it, it's just work that seems to kill it. The two sensible options there are use the pug or get a new job.

 

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[reb]

I now no longer have the only 5 pot whiteblock at work, nor do I have the most inappropriate delivery chariot.

 

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[reb]

It's ok, i didn't need to know how much fuel I have left anyway.

Right hand dash light has gone from intermittent, to only on when I hit it, and now just not working. I'm hoping it's an easy job, wonder if a couple of little LEDs would do the job.

 

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[Tickman]

Cheaper still:

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/6000LM-LED-Flashlight-Camping-Torch-Super-Bright-CREE-Q5-14500-3-Modes-Lamp-UK/162733956771?hash=item25e3b31ea3:g:vA8AAOSw0hlZKE2N

 

[Supernaut]

Cheaper still:

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/6000LM-LED-Flashlight-Camping-Torch-Super-Bright-CREE-Q5-14500-3-Modes-Lamp-UK/162733956771?hash=item25e3b31ea3:g:vA8AAOSw0hlZKE2N

 

He wants to see the fuel gauge, not melt a hole through it!

[tooSavvy]

reb..

 

You observe 'plod not fussed at my metal plates'..?

 

I have ally pressed plates on my Toyyo & from a guy in Glasgow - postcode marked etc..

 

I was in the ATS/MOT place the other day - exhaust fix - and the lad said the same thing "hmm, aren't these pressed ally plates illegal/plod magnets/MOT fail?"

 

The site manager (MOT tester) just said "meh!" <shrugging>..

 

I lifted the following, from PH...

 

"Since the start of november number plate laws have changed.... however I was still lead to believe these ones were legal - police are starting to bring a system were points can be given

 

I showed the traffic cop the BS number, the name and postcode printed where they were made and that there reflective and sold /advertised to me as legal blah blah blah and he basically said they're not a flush plate and the only pressed plates that are legal are for pre 1972 vehicles."

 

 

What's the craic.

 

 

TS

[Anthony]

It's ok, i didn't need to know how much fuel I have left anyway.

Right hand dash light has gone from intermittent, to only on when I hit it, and now just not working. I'm hoping it's an easy job, wonder if a couple of little LEDs would do the job.

It's probably not the bulb but the bulb holder judging from the progressively more intermittent nature, usually a bad connection between the holder and the copper track on the clocks.

 

GTi clocks are terrible for this (there's far more illumination bulbs than the base model clocks like yours), seemingly particularly after they've been sat unused for a prolonged period. On a friends GTi I've just finished recommissioning, I had to fix about half a dozen bulbs that were out - only one was the bulb itself, the rest were bad connections on the bulb holders.

 

Removing the clocks is easy enough (two screws behind heater control facia, one behind coin tray, one behind triangular bit (or two behind the large triagular bit if you've no coin tray), two deeply recessed ones under the steering column and if it's never been out before, one recessed and hidden screw on the door side of the instrument binnacle). Once all of those are out, the binnacle comes off by pulling upwards and towards you, and there's two screws holding the clocks themselves in - pop the speedo cable off the back and unplug wiring and it'll come straight out.

[reb]

reb..

 

You observe 'plod not fussed at my metal plates'..?

 

I have ally pressed plates on my Toyyo & from a guy in Glasgow - postcode marked etc..

 

I was in the ATS/MOT place the other day - exhaust fix - and the lad said the same thing "hmm, aren't these pressed ally plates illegal/plod magnets/MOT fail?"

 

The site manager (MOT tester) just said "meh!" <shrugging>..

 

I lifted the following, from PH...

 

"Since the start of november number plate laws have changed.... however I was still lead to believe these ones were legal - police are starting to bring a system were points can be given

 

I showed the traffic cop the BS number, the name and postcode printed where they were made and that there reflective and sold /advertised to me as legal blah blah blah and he basically said they're not a flush plate and the only pressed plates that are legal are for pre 1972 vehicles."

 

 

What's the craic.

 

 

TS

As far as I can tell, it's one of those things nobody actually knows what on earth is actually true or not.

As far as I remember from skimming through the BS documentation the material etc isn't actually specified, just the characteristics. From what I remember there's also provision for 3D characters, so that's the pressed part looked after. At the end of the day I'm satisfied that they meet the standards, I'll happily take them off if anyone can come up with a better reason than "they're illegal innit". Of course, I have a pair of acrylic plates in the boot which I'll happily fit for any plod that're stubborn.

 

At the end of the day it also comes down to the impression given off by the rest of the car; a well kept old Volvo versus some modified shitbox, which are they more likely to find something wrong with?

 

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[reb]

It's probably not the bulb but the bulb holder judging from the progressively more intermittent nature, usually a bad connection between the holder and the copper track on the clocks.

 

GTi clocks are terrible for this (there's far more illumination bulbs than the base model clocks like yours), seemingly particularly after they've been sat unused for a prolonged period. On a friends GTi I've just finished recommissioning, I had to fix about half a dozen bulbs that were out - only one was the bulb itself, the rest were bad connections on the bulb holders.

 

Removing the clocks is easy enough (two screws behind heater control facia, one behind coin tray, one behind triangular bit (or two behind the large triagular bit if you've no coin tray), two deeply recessed ones under the steering column and if it's never been out before, one recessed and hidden screw on the door side of the instrument binnacle). Once all of those are out, the binnacle comes off by pulling upwards and towards you, and there's two screws holding the clocks themselves in - pop the speedo cable off the back and unplug wiring and it'll come straight out.

I have a few jobs needing done that involve dismantling of the dash, I'll do them all at once when I get a chance. Another niggle is the heater/fan controls don't seem to be actually connected to anything, so no heater fan. I'm about 90% sure at least the fan control worked when I bought the car, but I never use it so I can't know definitely.

 

Part of me wishes I still had the Polo since it never seemed to go wrong, but then I also remember it was water soluble.

 

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[bezzabsa]

Hmmmm 90% of the Plod chariots round here have Pressed metal plates!!!! Go Figure!!

[Anthony]

I have a few jobs needing done that involve dismantling of the dash, I'll do them all at once when I get a chance. Another niggle is the heater/fan controls don't seem to be actually connected to anything, so no heater fan. I'm about 90% sure at least the fan control worked when I bought the car, but I never use it so I can't know definitely.

If the fan is doing nothing then it's often the fan resistor module that's playing up. It's located to the right of the fan above the passenger footwell - white 5 pin plug on it, held in by two screws.

 

If you remove it, you'll see a sprung metal contact on the underside of it - often the issue is a bad connection on this. With the module removed but still plugged in, switch the fan to high speed and give that sprung contact a wiggle - fan will probably come on briefly when you wiggle if that's the problem.

 

From memory, this 205 has been left parked up and unused hasn't it? In my experience, that's the single biggest cause of electrical headaches on them - in regular use they're normally pretty reliable and certainly no worse than anything else of that period, but leave them untouched for months and the damp starts getting in everything and playing havoc electrically (I have a particular dislike to whoever at PSA specified unsealed connectors for just about everything electrical on a 205 as it's the single biggest cause of woe, a situation thankfully remedied on the 306)

[reb]

If the fan is doing nothing then it's often the fan resistor module that's playing up. It's located to the right of the fan above the passenger footwell - white 5 pin plug on it, held in by two screws.

 

If you remove it, you'll see a sprung metal contact on the underside of it - often the issue is a bad connection on this. With the module removed but still plugged in, switch the fan to high speed and give that sprung contact a wiggle - fan will probably come on briefly when you wiggle if that's the problem.

 

From memory, this 205 has been left parked up and unused hasn't it? In my experience, that's the single biggest cause of electrical headaches on them - in regular use they're normally pretty reliable and certainly no worse than anything else of that period, but leave them untouched for months and the damp starts getting in everything and playing havoc electrically (I have a particular dislike to whoever at PSA specified unsealed connectors for just about everything electrical on a 205 as it's the single biggest cause of woe, a situation thankfully remedied on the 306)

I'll have a look at that. It certainly was parked up for the first half of 2017, and it's definitely damp because crap sunroof seal. Almost all of the electrical problems so far have been dodgy connections, so I'm hopeful it's the same here.

 

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[reb]

It looks ok in the dark, think the sidelights are a bit bright though

 

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[Noel Tidybeard]

from VOSA website

 

 

2. Rules for number plates

Your number plates should:

• be made from a reflective material
• display black characters on a white background (front plate)
• display black characters on a yellow background (rear plate)
• not have a background pattern

Characters on a number plate can be 3D.

 

so no mention of plastic only and 3D IS ok

[reb]

The left stalk has failed in a hilarious* manner again. I can flash the high beam/spots with the headlights off and with the sidelights on, but with the headlights on I get nothing. This is the second time it's happened and the first replacement lasted just over a year. I don't know whether to get another used one or to just buy the brand new ones of much expense and potentially dubious quality. I thought it was maybe not enjoying running the spotlights, but I doubt the tiny amount of extra current the relay draws is going to affect much?

 

It has highlighted exactly how shit the headlight bulbs are though. Maybe I'm just spoiled by having nightbreakers in the volvo?

 

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[Tickman]

They genuinely cannot be worse than the Alfa. Admittedly one hits the ground far closer than it should and the other just doesn't give off enough light.

[reb]

I'm not sure they're aimed right, but also they give out around the same amount of light as a pair of expired glow sticks. Ah well, it's not like I drive a lot at night or anything like that...

 

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