Jump to content


Welcome to Autoshite

Welcome to Autoshite, like most online communities you must register to view or post in our community, but don't worry this is a simple free process that requires minimal information for you to signup. Be apart of Autoshite by signing in or creating an account.
  • Start new topics and reply to others
  • Subscribe to topics and forums to get automatic updates
  • Get your own profile and make new friends
  • Customize your experience here
Guest Message by DevFuse
 

Photo

What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread.


  • Please log in to reply
42635 replies to this topic

#42511 ONLINE   The Moog

The Moog

    Rank: Lancia Gamma

  • Staff
  • 6,230 posts
  • 15 thanks
  • LocationAccrington .. who the heck are they ...
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 11 October 2017 - 09:02 PM

I have a big package on a pallet waiting outside for me to open tomorrow.

It might contain Puma bits :-)
  • eddyramrod, Sloth in a bowl and Cavcraft like this

2000 - Ford Poo ma 
2003 - Vel Shatis - Brightening my day with lovely warning lights

1997 - Corsa

2003 - Getz 


#42512 ONLINE   dodgytom

dodgytom

    C LI NT

  • Full Members
  • 2,460 posts
  • 8 thanks
  • LocationLudlow
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 11 October 2017 - 09:25 PM

How times have changed...

After mentioning The Wildhearts I played Earth Vs whilst cooking a stir fry. Bits of vegetables and noodles everywhere.
  • The Moog, loserone, mercedade and 1 other like this

Why would I give my valuable time to people I would much rather kick in the eye?


#42513 ONLINE   Tickman

Tickman

    Rank: Citroen Ami

  • Full Members
  • 1,041 posts
  • 7 thanks
  • LocationDundee
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 11 October 2017 - 09:42 PM

I have a big package on a pallet waiting outside for me to open tomorrow.

It might contain Puma bits :-)

 

Seats? They might get wet outside!


  • The Moog likes this

1968 Morris Minor 1000

1957 Morris Minor 1000

1968 Land Rover 

1985 Reliant Scimitar SS1

1972 Triumph Toledo

1986 Talbot Express Camper

Some other stuff that I will add at some point...


#42514 OFFLINE   xtriple

xtriple

    Brooklands banking...

  • Full Members
  • 2,836 posts
  • 4 thanks
  • LocationTorquay Devon
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 11 October 2017 - 10:21 PM

I never do the lottery. But, today I bought a ticket for the first time in years and while I haven't won as such, I got two numbers so I get another go apparently. I can feel it in my water, I'm gonna win MILLIONS!  :) 


  • privatewire, eddyramrod, purplebargeken and 3 others like this

#42515 OFFLINE   Tayne

Tayne

    Rank: Talbot Matra Rancho

  • Full Members
  • 11,607 posts
  • 4 thanks
  • LocationThe Granite City of Aberdeen
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 11 October 2017 - 11:08 PM

A chap who works in supermarket up here stole some lottery scratch cards in the belief that he could win a few quid.

 

He took scratch cards to the face value of £9,000.

 

After a lot of scratching he had won the grand total of...     £250!


  • privatewire, DSdriver, Sloth in a bowl and 5 others like this
Tous les Vauxhalls sont des merdes

#42516 OFFLINE   Pillock

Pillock

    It's true.

  • Full Members
  • 14,068 posts
  • 27 thanks
  • LocationMassive Wang.
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 11 October 2017 - 11:17 PM

... which were also logged on the system, and programmed to alert the operator if a winning one is presented.

Someone round here nicked the display case full of lottery tickets, and was surprised when the CCTV of them presenting a winning one was handed to the police the next day.
  • plumbertony likes this

#42517 ONLINE   The Moog

The Moog

    Rank: Lancia Gamma

  • Staff
  • 6,230 posts
  • 15 thanks
  • LocationAccrington .. who the heck are they ...
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 11 October 2017 - 11:42 PM

Seats? They might get wet outside!

Under lots of plastic......

It definitely has nothing to do with missus Moog getting angry at 6 30am tomorrow morning when climbing over seats..

That definitely have always been in the puma .... Definitely

2000 - Ford Poo ma 
2003 - Vel Shatis - Brightening my day with lovely warning lights

1997 - Corsa

2003 - Getz 


#42518 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

Cavcraft

    Rank: Outsider

  • Staff
  • 35,382 posts
  • 125 thanks
  • LocationI'm not a racist, I'm merely supporting my country! and central locking
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 12 October 2017 - 04:38 AM

Talking of stolen, a few years back someone robbed a bouncy castle from a local pub. The OB found it a week later, fully inflated in someone's back garden about a mile away.


  • eddyramrod, Stevebrookman and Hooli like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#42519 OFFLINE   strangeangel

strangeangel

    #togetherstronger

  • Full Members
  • 2,408 posts
  • 14 thanks
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 12 October 2017 - 07:56 AM

After years of festering in a shed in North Yorkshire, this spectacularly rank moped:

 

post-19532-0-25808500-1498423341.jpg

 

post-19532-0-48257600-1498423531.jpg

 

has successfully turned a wheel on the Queen's highway!

 

c942755a6cb461ee11dcebf5c11072f6.jpg

 

Love it :D


  • privatewire, catsinthewelder, DeeJay and 10 others like this

#42520 OFFLINE   beko1987

beko1987

    Shonky old Citroen

  • Full Members
  • 11,276 posts
  • 22 thanks
  • LocationThame, Oxon

Posted 12 October 2017 - 04:13 PM

Just picked amy up from the hospital. Driving down a rat run of speedbumps, we were down to 15mph due to her crying in pain on each one, which was annoying.

Clearly this was annoying to the Chavez dick head behind us who overtook. We are in a 20,so I wasn't going that slowly.

Whatever, fuck off then. Except there's traffic uo ahead, so we stay behind her.

Turns out, she hasn't quite mastered clutch control, and rolled back every time she moved away (we are going up a hill)

I made sure I stayed as far up her arse as I could at all times, we could see her panicking every time she pulled away for the 1/2 mile to the ring road, trying not to roll backwards into us. If she had, I'd have gone full arsehole initially right up to the point she probably would have started to cry, then I'd have given her a life lesson of not overtaking without checking infront that it's worth it! (c1 on p plates)

That'll teach her! Even amy laughed. Id have honked the horn too, but it doesn't work very well...
  • richardthestag, catsinthewelder, purplebargeken and 4 others like this

2005 Gooner2 2.2dci Auto ex taxi (apparently) (Ex Kiltox)

2008 orl Vauxhalls r Shit Zafira 1.8 SRI 140 (Hers)
 


#42521 OFFLINE   eddyramrod

eddyramrod

    The Crimson Avenger

  • Full Members
  • 11,303 posts
  • 10 thanks
  • LocationDead Man's Curve
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 12 October 2017 - 04:25 PM

Not really sure if this is a Grin or a Grump...

Today is the fifth anniversary of me starting at the bakery.

On balance, I'll go for Grin, because holding onto a job, any job, for five years is a bit of an achievement these days.


  • Cheggers, M'coli, privatewire and 4 others like this

The Blob: 2007 Chevrolet Tacuma (wheelchair bus)

Giffer: 1995 Rover 820Si

Huggy Bear: 1973 Cadillac Coupe de Ville

 

 

 

Mr ramrod is the nicest person in the world  (Chompy_snake, 2015)

Eddy is the finest fellow you will ever meet,  FACT (Djimbob, 2017)


#42522 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

Cavcraft

    Rank: Outsider

  • Staff
  • 35,382 posts
  • 125 thanks
  • LocationI'm not a racist, I'm merely supporting my country! and central locking
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 12 October 2017 - 04:47 PM

Well in there, StrangeAngel, you did well to get that back on the road by the look of it.


  • strangeangel likes this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#42523 ONLINE   Kiltox

Kiltox

    Rank: Renault 16

  • Full Members
  • 4,044 posts
  • 17 thanks

Posted 12 October 2017 - 04:49 PM

I probably wore the horn out :D

Not that hard to change, had to do it on the ex SiC Scenic for MOT
2017 17 Dacia Duster 1.6 Access
1997 R Rover 216 Cabriolet

#42524 OFFLINE   beko1987

beko1987

    Shonky old Citroen

  • Full Members
  • 11,276 posts
  • 22 thanks
  • LocationThame, Oxon

Posted 12 October 2017 - 06:23 PM

I probably wore the horn out :D

Not that hard to change, had to do it on the ex SiC Scenic for MOT

No I was in the Zafira. Easier for Amy to get in, and I didn't have to empty the gooner to swap the car seats

If I was in the gooner on my own I wouldn't have been doing 15mph/she wouldn't have got past

Horn on the gooner works fine, gets plenty of excersise
  • Kiltox likes this

2005 Gooner2 2.2dci Auto ex taxi (apparently) (Ex Kiltox)

2008 orl Vauxhalls r Shit Zafira 1.8 SRI 140 (Hers)
 


#42525 ONLINE   Kiltox

Kiltox

    Rank: Renault 16

  • Full Members
  • 4,044 posts
  • 17 thanks

Posted 12 October 2017 - 06:35 PM


Horn on the gooner works fine, gets plenty of excersise


Good lad, keep it in what it’s used to :D
  • beko1987 likes this
2017 17 Dacia Duster 1.6 Access
1997 R Rover 216 Cabriolet

#42526 OFFLINE   fordperv

fordperv

    Rank: Sierra base

  • Full Members
  • 6,043 posts
  • 4 thanks
  • Locationstoke on trent
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 12 October 2017 - 06:55 PM

Spotted a local registered, lesser spotted sad face fiesta earlier in non pogweasel red shock, it looked a tidying old girl there was a little rust on the back of sills/arch but other than that and the gash wheel trims it looked nice

20171012_151249.jpg

Oh shit I just checked the m.o.t status and the m.o.t has lapsed in may
  • Stevebrookman likes this
Sir slidealot, knight of the roundabout

#42527 OFFLINE   willswitchengage

willswitchengage

    Rank: Renault 16

  • Full Members
  • 3,058 posts
  • 0 thanks
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 12 October 2017 - 07:16 PM

Was watching a Vietnam war documentary and saw these LARCs which I'd never heard of before. How big?!

 


  • drum, Stevebrookman, Cavcraft and 1 other like this

254614.png


#42528 OFFLINE   BenHar

BenHar

    Rank: BL Wedge

  • Full Members
  • 797 posts
  • 8 thanks
  • LocationReigate, Surrey
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 12 October 2017 - 07:20 PM

Just picked amy up from the hospital. Driving down a rat run of speedbumps, we were down to 15mph due to her crying in pain on each one, which was annoying.

Clearly this was annoying to the Chavez dick head behind us who overtook. We are in a 20,so I wasn't going that slowly.

Whatever, fuck off then. Except there's traffic uo ahead, so we stay behind her.

Turns out, she hasn't quite mastered clutch control, and rolled back every time she moved away (we are going up a hill)

I made sure I stayed as far up her arse as I could at all times, we could see her panicking every time she pulled away for the 1/2 mile to the ring road, trying not to roll backwards into us. If she had, I'd have gone full arsehole initially right up to the point she probably would have started to cry, then I'd have given her a life lesson of not overtaking without checking infront that it's worth it! (c1 on p plates)

That'll teach her! Even amy laughed. Id have honked the horn too, but it doesn't work very well...


Be careful out there.

She'd claim you ran into the back of her and broke her neck.

And she'd win the claim.

Ben
  • cobblers and Hooli like this

CHRIS1980, on 08 Jan 2016 - 8:37 PM, said:snapback.png

Your clearly thick....end of.


#42529 ONLINE   cobblers

cobblers

    Rank: Renault 16

  • Full Members
  • 3,265 posts
  • 24 thanks
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 12 October 2017 - 07:38 PM

Yeah, the reason I got a dashcam is when a Ford Galaxy full of people rolled back down a hill in traffic towards me and stopped with millimeters to spare.



#42530 OFFLINE   hairnet

hairnet

    Rank: Organisation

  • Full Members
  • 7,242 posts
  • 4 thanks

Posted 12 October 2017 - 07:59 PM

all accomdation for usa nz trip booked

 

hiring this :D

 

yamaha-majesty-yp250-1.jpg

 

just have to book flight to nz from yank and the flight home :D

 

and its 4 months and two week to go :D


  • Heidel_Kakao, The Moog, Bucketeer and 3 others like this

#42531 OFFLINE   Ghosty

Ghosty

    Some people get all the breaks...

  • Full Members
  • 6,055 posts
  • 10 thanks
  • LocationManchester
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 12:36 AM

Passed a house in Sheffield earlier - two tone Alfa 165 on the drive, and a Merc W115 and an SVX outside :shock:
  • purplebargeken likes this

1987 Volvo 740 GLE

 

My name is Max!


#42532 OFFLINE   Jon

Jon

    Rank: Citroen Ami

  • Full Members
  • 1,515 posts
  • 0 thanks
  • LocationNZ
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 03:41 AM

An elderly neighbour came round today all in a panic, as she'd doofed a large metal bin in a local supermarket car park at low speed and was worried that she'd written her Mitsubishi Mirage off. Here's the result:

 

 

37665704491_33d0d8a78e_b.jpg

 

 

 

36954876294_9b2b4eb405_b.jpg

 

 

Photographer's Guild qualz images courtesy of the iphone 4 sitting in my pocket at the time.

 

 

 

Anyway, 25 minutes later (most of which were used trying to locate my best bodging tools) we had this:

 

 

37616109516_683b1924de_b.jpg

 

Again, hark at the mastery of my framing and overexposure, but you get the idea. I also found out that Autosol is good for removing paint scuffs. Anyway, Pebble Beach entrants will hardly be quivering in their handmade Italian brogues but our neighbour was over the moon and insisted on trying to pay me. 

 

I told her that the 2 hours each day she'd spent visiting and overfeeding our cat  whilst we were away for over a month was probably enough payment....


  • danthecapriman, The Moog, eddyramrod and 10 others like this

#42533 ONLINE   steveo3002

steveo3002

    Rank: BL Wedge

  • Full Members
  • 609 posts
  • 5 thanks
  • Locationsaffron walden
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 08:16 AM

whats the black thing sticking out?



#42534 OFFLINE   BavarianRetro

BavarianRetro

    Rank: Citroen Ami

  • Full Members
  • 1,140 posts
  • 4 thanks
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 08:17 AM

Talking of stolen, a few years back someone robbed a bouncy castle from a local pub. The OB found it a week later, fully inflated in someone's back garden about a mile away.

Many years ago a post van or post man in the Glasgow area was robbed on a Thursday morning

A couple of hours later two masked men brandishing a sawn off shotgun entered a post office, marched up to the counter and tipped over 100 Giro cheques out of a carrier bag and pointed the gun at the teller, shouting

"Fucking cash thaim!"
  • richardthestag, The Moog, cms206 and 1 other like this

#42535 OFFLINE   Stanky

Stanky

    Forum Bursar

  • Full Members
  • 1,798 posts
  • 50 thanks
  • LocationFareham
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 08:26 AM

Was watching a Vietnam war documentary and saw these LARCs which I'd never heard of before. How big?!

 

 

There used to be 3 of these parked up on some waste ground on the right as you drove into Portsmouth - near the old dog track. They are flipping MASSIVE


  • danthecapriman and Hooli like this
1996 Nissan Almera GX (departed)
2003 Toyota Yaris
2004 SAAB 9-3

Posted Image

#42536 OFFLINE   NorfolkNWeigh

NorfolkNWeigh

    Rank: Lancia Gamma

  • Full Members
  • 5,912 posts
  • 5 thanks
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 08:35 AM

23.30 last night M25 near Maple Cross.
For 3 miles there had been a gradual closing of the outside 3 lanes, you know the sort of thing arrows then eventually big red crosses, leading up to a tapering row of cones and flashing lights.
Traffic was relatively light and everyone had duly filed into lane 1, I say everyone..
A red Focus comes barrelling up the 2 nd lane thinking he can beat the guys putting out the cones, the cone man literally throws a cone in front of the Focus who is next to me doing about 60 , I of course hold my position and put my hand flat on the horn to add to the drama.
In the mirror I see the Focus hit the cone dead on and bits of plastic, presumably grille and bumper, flying everywhere .
Now that's teamwork! I swear I could hear the cone guys cheering.
  • Pillock, catsinthewelder, eddyramrod and 8 others like this

#42537 OFFLINE   strangeangel

strangeangel

    #togetherstronger

  • Full Members
  • 2,408 posts
  • 14 thanks
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 09:54 AM

The fact that I'm shit at fleet reduction :)



#42538 OFFLINE   Danterzza

Danterzza

    Rank: Renault 16

  • Full Members
  • 2,589 posts
  • 2 thanks
  • LocationDerby
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 10:45 AM

My bro just sent me this beauty he has spotted in Latvia.

094d036e696c365ac06b34a59e7a1962.jpg


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  • M'coli and strangeangel like this

#42539 ONLINE   Hooli

Hooli

    Rank: Lancia Gamma

  • Full Members
  • 5,792 posts
  • 44 thanks
  • LocationNr Doncaster
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 11:24 AM

23.30 last night M25 near Maple Cross.
For 3 miles there had been a gradual closing of the outside 3 lanes, you know the sort of thing arrows then eventually big red crosses, leading up to a tapering row of cones and flashing lights.
Traffic was relatively light and everyone had duly filed into lane 1, I say everyone..
A red Focus comes barrelling up the 2 nd lane thinking he can beat the guys putting out the cones, the cone man literally throws a cone in front of the Focus who is next to me doing about 60 , I of course hold my position and put my hand flat on the horn to add to the drama.
In the mirror I see the Focus hit the cone dead on and bits of plastic, presumably grille and bumper, flying everywhere .
Now that's teamwork! I swear I could hear the cone guys cheering.

 

Brilliant. Hopefully they got reported to plod too.


  • purplebargeken likes this

#42540 OFFLINE   Eddie Honda

Eddie Honda

    Rank: Renault 16

  • Full Members
  • 3,158 posts
  • 19 thanks
  • Country : Country Flag

Posted 13 October 2017 - 11:29 AM

 

089090 SKOOTERBOY

 


  • M'coli likes this




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users