Spitting feathers............................

[Rocket88]

Yesterday, I posted an ad on our "local" car selling website, namely a 2002 Ocatvia 1.9tdi auto, ex taxi, but in bloody good condition, for £1600 [a trifle optimistic, but they're rare over here, and people are beginning to "get" Skodas].

This foreign twunt rings me up, says I have to bring the car to him as he has no transport. So, 6 mile drive [i know, but it's a long way in Jersey!] to meet in an underground carpark.Three shambling retards, [2 male] flag me down as I sweep majestically into said carpark . They look over the car, and ask me unintelligable questions, to which I supply ever more morose answers. I discover we're waiting for a friend of theirs, "who know about cars".

A black 911 mosies into the carpark, and this tosser in a pink cashmere sweater leaps out. Takes one look at the Octavia, and says "I didn't realise it was a Skoda, they're not very good cars, are they? I resist the temptation to punch him in the face, and, leaving him behind, me and the three retards go for a test drive. For those of you who don't know, the limit over here is 40 mph, the fat gherkin who is doing the driving has the poor old girl up to 80 as soon as we've left the car park, then rams on the brakes. "Just to test"

10 minutes later, we're back in the carpark, cashmere bloke looks under the bonnet, kicks tyres [yes really!] complains about a small dent in the boot lid, winges about the mileage, and then goes into a huddle with the three retards.

"We've decided to make you an offer"..."I can hardly contain my excitement", thought I......"what would you say to £800"....Well, what I did say was something along the lines of "piss off you cashmere wearing, VW Beetle driving poof," and promptly left said carpark. Another 90 minutes of my life wasted.........

[Pillock]

'Didn't realise it was a Skoda'???I guess it could have been a Mazda Octavia. Or a Ford Octavia. Or one of those Lambourghini Octavias. Not a bad price at all I reckon (the £1600, not their joke offer!), although I've got an image in my head of an ex-taxi being white with black bonnet and bootlid like they all are around here. Tends to knock resale values slightly

[pogweasel]

Don't want to get too 'Daily Mail' but I refuse to deal with anyone who when phoning up sounds vaguely foreign. Just not worth the hassle, you know that they are going to take the piss or try to haggle like you're doing a deal on a £10 rug in a marakesh market. Best one I had was the turkish gentleman who upon winning an auction which had 18 pics of the car, including 5 of the blue velour interior, asked to have it at 50% of the winning bid, because it didn't have leather seats and he wanted leather seats, but he'd come 40 miles to collect. Swiftly told to COCK RIGHT OFF.

[Torsten2001]

I have no problem with a foreign accent but anyone brash or just not very polite will incur my wraith! Similarly I won't buy buy from same, I also have a buying embargo on cars from Edmonton and Southall in London, not that there's any decent cars there!

[MrRegieRitmo]

This foreign twunt rings me up, says I have to bring the car to him as he has no transport. So, 6 mile drive [i know, but it's a long way in Jersey!] to meet in an underground carpark.Three shambling retards, [2 male] flag me down as I sweep majestically into said carpark . They look over the car, and ask me unintelligable questions, to which I supply ever more morose answers. I discover we're waiting for a friend of theirs, "who know about cars".

A black 911 mosies into the carpark, and this tosser in a pink cashmere sweater leaps out.

Sounded rather risky - thought you were gonna say you were 'car jacked'!

[pogweasel]

^whs^I wouldn't be taking a car to someone in a car park, no thanks. Many times I've had an assistant present when flogging old tat, just to even things up a bit, you do meet some right dodgy f*ckers, and you can usually tell which ones they are over the phone. They are the same ones who want the car signed over and on their "MoT exempt" transit before trying to hand you not enough cash. At least when I had my tat-barn if they tried owt they wouldn't get far, as the main gate had a pin-code opening. Plus Farma_Frank would usually come out for a nose anyway.

[Rocket88]

Thankfully, we don't have the real scum of the earth over here yet [no welfare state helps] so getting the crap kicked out of you and your wheels stolen isn't going to happen. The foreign legion were actually ok, it was the tosser in the Porsche who hacked me off, with his patronising, "Oh, it's a Skoda" crap. I'd have taken a decent offer on it, but if you say you want £1600, why offer half, you know it's "likely to offend......."

[Rocket88]

'Didn't realise it was a Skoda'???I guess it could have been a Mazda Octavia. Or a Ford Octavia. Or one of those Lambourghini Octavias. Not a bad price at all I reckon (the £1600, not their joke offer!), although I've got an image in my head of an ex-taxi being white with black bonnet and bootlid like they all are around here. Tends to knock resale values slightly

No, you're finest silver. Apart from a bit of wear on the driver's seat bolster, it's spot on. As taxis are the only cars that have to have an annual inspection over here [far tougher than an MOT] you know it'll be ok, as they'll fail them on anything! Wear on bolster would be a failure...