Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 EDIT EDIT EDIT : BMW E34 525i SE FOAR SAYAL!!!!!! SEE page 6.By 'eck! Today I am to foray into not one but two of those far flung regions of the Empire where life is cheap but Greggs is cheaper. I am talking, of course, about Yorkshire (where the fuck is that, you say, and who can blame you?) and, even more extremely, some place near Sunderland, where the people aren't even proper Georgies, FFS. Macadams, or something, I gather, so maybe at least they have some tarmac roads. Anyway, I am not launching this mission for a few hours yet (later departure equals cheapo deal on East Coast railytrain), but my sheer excitement at the prospect of collecting what I hope will be my reliable* and not very rusty* winter waft-o-chode has got me up early, keen to share with fellow tat botherers my exciting journey of discovery and wonder. Updates to follow. Designated station runner - old Landy of oldness, because it can be left on its arse for ages and always starts first time, unlike certain swankpot Shaguars that I could mention. I try to park my incredibly shonky looking and taped up Series 3 next to the shiniest modern Landy at Princes Risborough car park, pour epater la bourgeoisie, obvs. Fuck me, that Landy was a good buy. Almost two years since eBay 1500 quid purchasage, and it has not once given me any gyp. Er. hope it isn't reading this thread.... Vince70, Magnificent Rustbucket, holbeck and 8 others 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skattrd Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 More chod Mr_BV, your fleet is increasing a bit of late. So, Yorkshire and Sunderland .... Lets think whats for sale around those parts, maybe an R8 from JohnK or the 405 estate from Baz_Shitpez? Junkman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cheggers Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 You are Ranulph Feinnes AICMFP...don't forget your passport and phrase book. Magnificent Rustbucket and Junkman 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UltraWomble Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 I have to pop into Yorkshire most Saturdays (briefly) and find this most useful: Junkman and Slartibartfast 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnK Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 More chod Mr_BV, your fleet is increasing a bit of late. So, Yorkshire and Sunderland .... Lets think whats for sale around those parts, maybe an R8 from JohnK or the 405 estate from Baz_Shitpez?It's an ex JohnK car he's buying, not an R8 though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 No breakfasty croissants or Maccy Dee Muffin of SHAEM for me today. I have scoffed up the leftover cuzza from last night's takeaway, with a fried egg on top. Nom of noms. Plans almost kerbuggered by Landy being empty of pez, and local garage closed for refurb, but just now the garage has re opened, so phew. PS: has to be Landy cos - Dolomite - still misfiring, still trying to find someone to fix it. Usual mech hors de combat, shortage of old car mechs in my area. Rover - mystery oil spaff, oil pressure too low.Lotus - working, but in London getting some new bits bolted on.Jaguar - working, but has weird charging or battery drain issue, so can't be relied on to start if left at station for a few days. Big Muthafugga jumpah pack not yet delivered from internetz shoppage place. In other words, bog standard multi-shite SNAFU. Junkman and scruff 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 It's an ex JohnK car he's buying, not an R8 though! Das ist echt so. Junkman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Six-cylinder Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 winter waft-o-chode Winter = closed car? Waft = Automatic? Chode = 80s/90s? Junkman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drum Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 BMW? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skizzer Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Is it that E34 5-series? Hope so, I like them. Ex-JohnK is definitely a good sign, I'd say - reckon he's a man who knows how to pick a good 'un and look after it. Junkman and Taff 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skizzer Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 PS: has to be Landy cos - Dolomite - still misfiring, still trying to find someone to fix it. Usual mech hors de combat, shortage of old car mechs in my area. Rover - mystery oil spaff, oil pressure too low.Lotus - working, but in London getting some new bits bolted on.Jaguar - working, but has weird charging or battery drain issue, so can't be relied on to start if left at station for a few days. Big Muthafugga jumpah pack not yet delivered from internetz shoppage place. In other words, bog standard multi-shite SNAFU. Ah, I was just about to observe that clearly the key to running a fleet of British classics is to buy a cheap German runabout you can count on. Luckily the Land Rover has saved me from saying this, and from the massive flame attack that would have followed. anonymous user, Junkman and alf892 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Five Series Bimmerwagen in JRG over luxo-brown it is. Anticipated Waft Factor: maximum Put pez in Landy, drove half way to station, realised had left phone at home. Considered pressing on (did it phoneless with SD1), but thought better of it and went back. Had to wait engine off for an elegant four in hand buggy (four greys, lovely horses) to pass. Ditto on the way back to the station, they having reversed course. Then got Landy up to an indicated 60 mph in overdrive - seems to like refurbed garage pez. Going smoothly, sounds rorty, really a fun heap to drive. Brakes kershonkered, but double pumping works OK. Anyway, missed intended train despite OMG fastLandyness, but now on another train that should get me to that London on time for connection northwards, and has WiFi for thread updateage. Ticket machine on blink, so could not collect ticket. May have to deal with Bottom Inspector in hat at Marylebone when trying to collect ticket there, but am used to that. In bag: boring file of work, motorsport mag about Graham Hill, adjustable spanner, three screwdrivers, torch, tape, Swiss Army knife, hi viz jacket, toothbrush. AA card and mobile phone at the ready, but am hoping for a smooth run. Vince70, catsinthewelder, Rusty_Rocket and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplebargeken Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 I still have available a travelling Dolomite Sprint Guru person for the use of. It would rescue the Dolly from a life of a yellow paperweight and he is very reasonable re: price. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Departed King's Cross on the 1230 East Coast to Edinburgh (the line is now sadly run by Virgin after being excellently run in public ownership, but Cameron's pals must have their sweeties, so hey ho). Photie of Goonershed attached for norf Lahndan scenic detail. Arsenal = bunch of arse. I am getting off the train at Northallerton, alleged to be a town in Yorkshire, where my mate Simon will meet me in one of his sheds - hopefully some pimp-o-rama Merc thing, but possibly a 530i of some kind. He has a spiffy 944 Turbo with Burgundy velour stripy seats, but that is having its annual faffage in a shed, he says. The Chiltern chuffer was mobbed by the worst type of minor public school twats in their thirties, booming out about their horrid modern cars, their appalling kids' wanky schools, and footy. Shouty, yobby fuckwits. The East Coast train has a few of those, but also some old beardy dude opposite me who appears to have terminal TB and is open mouth coughing his lungs up all over the place, and gurgling horribly between coughs. Pretty normal travel arrangements, in other words. You can tell that Virgin has taken over because the carriage smells of shit. This is a feature of the Pendolinos on the west coast. These east coast trains (not Pendolinos -something older and a bit classier) didn't used to smell, but now they do - must be a Virgin feature. Irrelevant CSB braggage: I led the legal team that got the previous dud East Coast Line franchisees sacked and the line renationalised, albeit only temporarily, alas. Junkman, pompei, laser wheels and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowtimer Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Greetings everyone. I am that renegade Yorkshireman and hereby claim my own five pounds. While the wheels of Virgin East Coast fortune rattle away under BV72, I am about to see if can find a serviceable Panzerkampfwagen under a huge layer of dust and squashed flies, and whether the battery has sustained itself over the last week. If not he'll have to either leg it from Northallerton or go in my own autoshitey 5-er, bwahahaha The Moog, Junkman, scruff and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eddyramrod Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Rover - mystery oil spaff, oil pressure too low.That's what killed my 2600 VDP. Needs properly investigating, stat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anonymous user Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 In bag: boring file of work, motorsport mag about Graham Hill, adjustable spanner, three screwdrivers, torch, tape, Swiss Army knife, hi viz jacket, toothbrush. AA card and mobile phone at the ready, but am hoping for a smooth run.You disappoint me, no hip-flask, have you seen the price of drink on trains these days and if nothing else it will take away the taste of railway coffee/tea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercrocker Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Not to mention dulling the senses to those around you. I don't mind public transport - its the bloody public I hate. Hope the tat is worth it! Junkman, anonymous user and alf892 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 That's what killed my 2600 VDP. Needs properly investigating, stat. I know. I am perturbed. No obvious signs of engine failure such as noises, vibrations, smoke etc, but sudden deposit of oil from exit point unknown while car outside house. Needs to be towed to somewhere that can get it up on a ramp. Oil was recent and fresh, filter ditto, appears to have been oil reaching cam box, camshaft does not appear to have self welded. I cannot see if there is a hole in the block. Sump seems OK as car not dropping oil after refilling. Mysterious and a tad concerning. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Greetings everyone. I am that renegade Yorkshireman and hereby claim my own five pounds. While the wheels of Virgin East Coast fortune rattle away under BV72, I am about to see if can find a serviceable Panzerkampfwagen under a huge layer of dust and squashed flies, and whether the battery has sustained itself over the last week. If not he'll have to either leg it from Northallerton or go in my own autoshitey 5-er, bwahahaha Welcome, you great big Yorkshire pouffe celebre. Good luck Herr Bartlett mit der tyrekicken ya. stormee and Junkman 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 The coffee is indeed ganker, BTW. Junkman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lowtimer Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 The coffee was grim when it was Nat Exp, grim when it was DOR and is still grim now it's Virgin. I did however last night appreciate the complimentary smoked salmon sandwiches, G&Ts, lemon drizzle cake and crisps that I scored off them on the Harry Laters train last night. Arrived home fat and mildly pissed, and all for £40 erste classe from the Land of the Plunking Banjo (i.e. Ely) Junkman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Erste Klasse on advanced booking spesh offa today has crapola frozen solid eggy sarnies, and no booze cos Saturdays. Junkman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 I biffed the dodgy looking cake. Some sort of iced fancy slice. Looks like the sort of thing that, along with Hostess Twinkies, cockroaches, and old Beemers, will survive nuclear war. One day this forum will be all bits of indestructible cake and cockroaches buying and selling old Beemers off one another, and going on about collecting them. More realistic than Mad Max, anyway. Junkman, anonymous user, Vince70 and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anonymous user Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 ^ are you sure you haven't been imbibing from a hip-flask Skizzer, Junkman and Magnificent Rustbucket 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Wish I was. The stench of human waste on this train is overwhelming. Why TF can they not sort out the loos on these trains? I do not recall stinky trains on the SNCF, in Italy and so on. Junkman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billyboy406v6 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Wish I was. The stench of human waste on this train is overwhelming. Why TF can they not sort out the loos on these trains? I do not recall stinky trains on the SNCF, in Italy and so on. No loos on train, hence smell of shit everywhere ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Breadvan72 Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 The tea isn't bad. Nearly at Northallerton. Mr Bronchial Disorder got off at York, thank fook. At least the phlegm-bespattered carriage is now a bit quieter. I have not owned a BMW since 1997, when I chopped in my 1992 325i (K993 FUW - still alive, last time I checked), for a new Fiat Coupe Turbo that I should never have sold in evah, but did. Now I is a bit excite. Fond memories of that fabby sixtastical engine. This bit of Yorkland appears to be rather flat. Where all the hills and dales, eh? Hang on, I can see some a way off. Junkman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purplebargeken Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 Nice chippy in the High Street at Northallerton (5 mins walk from the hospital). I also have a mate who is a GP there. Don't let your satnav take you down a virtually deserted goat track. Don't ask how I know about said track. tooSavvy 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anonymous user Posted October 10, 2015 Share Posted October 10, 2015 ^ mumble, mumble, mumble, something about goats and on a register? purplebargeken 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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