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Automotive bull5hit facts thread


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1354 replies to this topic

#61 OFFLINE   richardthestag

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 03:23 PM

 
Malaysians built a diesel version of the Vincent Black Shadow under licence but it needed an electric start after the locals kept breaking ankles trying to kick start them.

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Shitroen C4 GP 2007 1.6HDi - Wife's daily written off, farewell trusty but slightly unpredictable steed

Pug 307 - son's daily runner Sold to Arthur Foxhake

Range Rover Vogue 1993 - my daily runner

Daewoo Matiz 2002 - Sold

Jaguar x308 Sovereign 4 litre - nicked by Fathathestag might be up 4sayle soon

Triumph Staaag 1973 - cheaper than a mistress.. just

Range Rover 1972 - ongoing extensive restoration

Range Rover 1972 - complete shed but in line for restoration

Land Rover 1969 SIIa SWB - belongs to Fathathestag but maintained and welded by me

BMW E46 318i touring - sold to hhhugues

 


#62 OFFLINE   Bren

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 03:24 PM

True fact.

Engineers at powertrain stated the k series issues were down to unsympathetic owners.

For unsympathetic read "they started them up."

#63 OFFLINE   Negative Creep

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 03:37 PM

A Porsche 911 engine fits straight into a Beetle

 

 

A mobile speed camera once picked up a Tornado bomber which had a missile lock on them

 

 

Putting cling film over your numberplate makes you can't get caught by speed cameras

 

 

The Mitsubishi Starion was misnamed because they can't pronounce the word stallion (it's actually a portmanteau of Star and Orion)


2006 Golf GT - not really shite, or shit for that matter


#64 OFFLINE   AndyW201

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 03:48 PM

Harris Mann, designer of the Allegro and TR7 played saxophone on Gerry Rafferty's Baker Street. Not Bob Holness as previously claimed. Although Holness did add the side scallops to Mann's original design sketch for the TR7 so the two men do have a connection.

Roy Axe invented the game 'Ker-Plunk'.

Motoring writer LJK Setright was a fully qualified British Darts Organisation scorer and was the first to give the famous shout " ONE HUNDRED AND EIIIGGGGHHHHHTYYYYY" during a televised match.

The Queen opened Santa Pod raceway in 1966, taking part, of course, in the first RWYB putting down a reasonable 18.2 second quarter mile time in her Hartwell tuned Hillman Imp

Jaguar once developed an E type with a super-close ratio 16 speed gearbox. Only one was made however, it featured in the John Wayne film 'Brannigan'.

It has been proved beyond all doubt that once a very ordinary, not very sought after old car has been bought at auction for £1200 then advertised by some chancer on ebay for £3000, that it will become rare and only go up in value.
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Current rides
1993 Mercedes 190e 2.6 auto sportline
2004 Skoda Octavia 1.8 VRS

Autoshite- Doing for the classic car movement what cystitis does for honeymoons.

#65 ONLINE   sierraman

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 03:48 PM

Left hand drive cars have the pedals the other way round.

The original Golf GTI was designed by Bob Hoskins during a row with Bob Carolgees on a cross channel ferry about Russian Tractors. He drew it upside down initially, then by some fate he posted it to Volkswagen, who ended up paying him something like £14.60 for the rights to build it. He went on to have a bit part in a few films here and there.

Its also a fact they made a factory Ford Granada RS, by welding together two Kent engines, side by side in the engine bay with a Four Wheel Drive system designed by Keith Chegwin. It was capable of 0-60 in 6.9 seconds and was recorded at an indicated 143mph on the A38 just outside Taunton by a the band who went on to be known as Texas. Then a mate of mines dad had it and swapped it for 16 lengths of tongue and groove and a Russell Hobbs Iron.

Fact.
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#66 OFFLINE   John F

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 03:51 PM

The Renault Twizy can detect the emotion of fear within its own passenger compartment, whereupon it autonomously parks safely so that the affected person can have a little cry.


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Never knowingly under-ambitious

 

'99 Land Rover Discovery ES V8

'97 Land Rover Discovery 300 TDi

'94 Vauxhall Calibra V6
'91 Maserati 222 SE

'88 Yamaha XJ900F

'86 Honda CBX 750F
'82 Suzuki GSX1100SZ Katana


#67 OFFLINE   Taff

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 03:57 PM

The 1098cc A series engine was converted to diesel and used as a generator by the British Army. Army HQ currently holds 1288 of these generators as war stock in Telford. They will fit straight into a Minor bodyshell once the mounts have been changed 


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so, it's 2am & I'm driving past prostitutes in short strappy dresses with bare arms and legs. I want to stop and offer them 10 minutes in a heated car, but no police officer is going to believe that.


#68 OFFLINE   warren t claim

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 04:09 PM

Contrary to popular belief the Madonna song Vogue isn't about Range Rovers but actually a tribute to her late father who was the main US distributor for Singer cars.
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Warren T Claim said, "I'd rather find blood on my toilet paper than a hybrid on my driveway".


#69 OFFLINE   Christine

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 04:12 PM

Off topic but i fell out with Gerry Rafferty .. He told me to "get the fuck off my property"  when i went there by mistake .. I didn't realise it was he at the time.  

I later asked my mate "who's the miserable bastard  at Tye Farm ? " 

"Oh, you mean Gerry Rafferty?He's a bit of a recluse you know "  

Ahh........ thinking about it .. yeah it was ... really hairy and in a lumberjack shirt , I didn't recognise him !


93 Pajero 2.5 td  

02 Honda HRV v-tec

98 Astra Arctic 1.6 16v

82 Fiesta mk1 1.1L

Vacancy for ....Viva HB  :-D


#70 OFFLINE   richardthestag

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 04:15 PM

Its also a fact they made a factory Ford Granada RS, by welding together two Kent engines, side by side in the engine bay 

 

Funny you should mention that because Harris Tweed was responsible for welding two dolomite engine blocks together to create the Triumph V8


Shitroen C4 GP 2007 1.6HDi - Wife's daily written off, farewell trusty but slightly unpredictable steed

Pug 307 - son's daily runner Sold to Arthur Foxhake

Range Rover Vogue 1993 - my daily runner

Daewoo Matiz 2002 - Sold

Jaguar x308 Sovereign 4 litre - nicked by Fathathestag might be up 4sayle soon

Triumph Staaag 1973 - cheaper than a mistress.. just

Range Rover 1972 - ongoing extensive restoration

Range Rover 1972 - complete shed but in line for restoration

Land Rover 1969 SIIa SWB - belongs to Fathathestag but maintained and welded by me

BMW E46 318i touring - sold to hhhugues

 


#71 OFFLINE   Christine

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 04:23 PM

You can tell if clutch and brake linings contain asbestos by sniffing them
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93 Pajero 2.5 td  

02 Honda HRV v-tec

98 Astra Arctic 1.6 16v

82 Fiesta mk1 1.1L

Vacancy for ....Viva HB  :-D


#72 ONLINE   RayMK

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 04:29 PM

Wartburg, keen to replace their aging three cylinder two stroke engine in the Knight, identified a powerplant with similar characterisics i.e. smooth, inefficient and smokey, that was available from VW, the new owners of NSU.  VW had discovered a warehouse full of the Wankel engines which NSU had stockpiled as first service consummables.  Ultimately, VW acquired Wartburg as well, and thus dropped the name.  Plans for the new model nevertheless went ahead in East Germany, under political pressure.  VW called it the Wankel Knight.  It was fitted with extra spotlamps to counteract the impaired vision which allegedly resulted from Wankel Knight activities, and a special holder for a box of tissues, a feature later copied by Japanese car manufacturers. In a last minute change of plan caused by VW conning Mazda in to buying the rights and existing stock of Wankel engines, the Knight project was kept mobile by inserting a VW Polo engine.  Sadly, its lack of smoothness, efficiency and inability to burn oil caused a devastating impact to oil and fossil fuel suppliers in East Germany and it was doomed to unpopularity and rapid demise.


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#73 OFFLINE   rml2345

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 04:38 PM

The Nissan Serena Diesel is actually a 450bhp twin turbo V10 but you have to use secret Nissan software to unlock the other 8 cylinders. Once unlocked it will do 0-60 in 6.8 seconds.
The Mitsubishi Carisma is a bad car.
Due to a technical glitch, Ukranian crime gangs can shut down the steering box on an Austin FX4.
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Current Wheels;
1994 Volvo 850 GLT Saloon (Twice)
Previous Wheels;
2003 Peugeot 406 HDi Saloon
2003 Rover 75 CDT Connoisseur Saloon
2003 Toyota "Leyland" Yaris T Spirit (Three times)
2002 Mitsubishi Carisma DI-D (Blob)
2001 Rover 75 CDT Tourer (Clover)
2000 Rover 75 CDT Saloon
2000 Honda Accord SE Executive
1996 Citroën Xantia Dimension (Les Hamper des Bisquites)
1996 Volvo 940 SE Turbo Estate (Beeb)
1993 Citroën AX Neon (Les Tin des Bisquites)
1994 Volvo 850 SE Saloon
1989 Volvo 740 GLE Saloon
1988 Volvo 740 GL Saloon (Telly)

#74 OFFLINE   Christine

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 04:51 PM

Girls are better drivers than boys .. insurance statistics prove this
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93 Pajero 2.5 td  

02 Honda HRV v-tec

98 Astra Arctic 1.6 16v

82 Fiesta mk1 1.1L

Vacancy for ....Viva HB  :-D


#75 OFFLINE   doobietoo

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 05:23 PM

Reducing the weight of a car will improve it's stopping distance
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1964 Austin 1100      ...shell in storage

1977 VDP 1500         ...rusty barn find...work in progress

1959 Austin A35        ...started weldathon / brakeathon / electricathon

2000 Saab 93            ...engine donor

2003 PT Cruiser       .... petrol  weekend toy

2003 PT Cruiser       .... diesel work van

2003 PT Cruiser       .... petrol ..because you can never have too many Cranberry PT Cruisers


#76 OFFLINE   UltraWomble

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 05:40 PM

The Mk 1 Ford Fiesta  front end design was based on a womans mimsey.

 

That woman was Lady Pinkingtom de Miffy-Smythe who had after attempting the world record for number of soldiers pleasured within a day and making love to over half of the Duke of York's regiment, was said to have a fanny like a smashed bucket.


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The Picasso is the future Morris Minor.

28241562828_2eb015f344_m.jpg


#77 OFFLINE   Justin Case

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 05:41 PM

Princess Anne never owned a Reliant Scimitar. In fact she bought a three wheeled Reliant Jaywick, which was shortly afterwards renamed the Reliant Regal in her honour.


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I tried to deny the existence of Ohm's Law, but I met too much resistance.

My photos: http://[email protected]/?saved=1

#78 OFFLINE   Justin Case

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 05:45 PM

A nuclear power source no bigger than a Swan Vesta matchbox was developed for the Metro in a secret Bunker near Longbridge. It never went into production as all of the drawings were bought up and destroyed by a consortium of head gasket manufacturers.


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I tried to deny the existence of Ohm's Law, but I met too much resistance.

My photos: http://[email protected]/?saved=1

#79 OFFLINE   RoadworkUK

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 05:57 PM

Rolls Royce sound deadening material is made from ground tortoiseshell and ivory splinters.

 

The Fuel Gauge on the Fiat Croma was labelled as the Depreciation gauge in certain markets.


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Come and visit Hooniverse! Pan-global Motoring News And Opinion

#80 OFFLINE   dollywobbler

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:08 PM

The Lancia Delta Integrale, Thema 8.32, Citroen SM and Mercedes-Benz W123 turbo diesel were never available with right-hand drive, because bloody Prince Charles used his power of veto to block them, as he feared they might steal sales from Aston Martin. His attempts to block the Alfa Romeo Spider were successful from 1978, but then thwarted by Gonville & Caius University who converted them in the UK using parts borrowed from the Fiat Panda.


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1972 Invacar Model 70, 1984 Reliant Fox

1986 Citroen 2CV6, 1990 Dacia 1310

1999 Daewoo Matiz, 2000 Rover 45 V6, 2001 Perodua Nippa
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#81 OFFLINE   Jerzy Woking

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:15 PM

Jowett Javelin wheels bolt straight onto an early BMW 3 series. When these are fitted with a cross ply tyre and a radial tyre on the same axle, the car will drift with ease, and will be practically impossible to spin out. 


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2005 Saab 9-5 with 300 bhp thanks to Noobtune, Abbott and Maptun.
1999 Mingebag Mercedes, given up on it, so SOLD

1994 Citroen AX Dimension, my winter bike. SOLD.


#82 OFFLINE   Anglevan

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:22 PM

You can swap the ID of a 1985 Austin Mini with that of a 1966 tax exempt model and no one will ever know (insert Land Rover in place of mini if required)
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#83 OFFLINE   NorfolkNWeigh

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:25 PM

During Project Drive it was considered that head gasket manufacture should be outsourced to Andrex, who had developed a 3 ply racing gasket with aloe Vera for Lotus. Unfortunately the cost was too high and the money saved was spent on making sure the TV's fitted to 75's were future proof.
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#84 OFFLINE   anonymous user

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:40 PM

Raliegh Bikes put the Sinclair C5 out of business. They were scared it might become more popular than the push-bike so put in a huge bulk order for tumble driers, all the electric motors intended for the C5 were diverted to go into tumble driers, which meant that C5 orders weren't completed on time and people bought push-bikes instead. All the tumble driers were fiddled with and returned as faulty nearly putting Hoover out of business as well.


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#85 OFFLINE   anonymous user

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:44 PM

The BMW Z3 was going to be marketed as  Triumph TR9, but a market focus group held at the Women's Institute in Ashby de la Zouche felt that the BMW name now had more cachet.


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#86 OFFLINE   anonymous user

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:46 PM

The dash-board switches in all Bristols are based on an original design used in the Hienkel HE111,



#87 OFFLINE   anonymous user

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:46 PM

Morgans have a wooden chassis


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#88 OFFLINE   anonymous user

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:47 PM

You can swap the ID of a 1985 Austin Mini with that of a 1966 tax exempt model and no one will ever know (insert Land Rover in place of mini if required)

I think if someone swapped a Land Rover for a mini I would know


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#89 OFFLINE   Felly Magic

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 06:47 PM

The Skoda Fabia was originally planed to be called the Labia, but was vetoed at the last minute by someone from Wolfsburg, who said 'Ve know buyers are kuntz, zerr iz noo need to remind zem viz ze name'


Yer can't beat a bit o' Autoshite

Felly :P

#90 OFFLINE   rml2345

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Posted 15 July 2015 - 07:11 PM

The coach builder Vanden Plas was founded by Otis Hydracyclic de Vanden-Plas during the Nazi occupation of Shetland in 1942.
Otis went on to be known for his work on elevators, epicyclic gearbox control systems and Allegros with picnic tables.
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Current Wheels;
1994 Volvo 850 GLT Saloon (Twice)
Previous Wheels;
2003 Peugeot 406 HDi Saloon
2003 Rover 75 CDT Connoisseur Saloon
2003 Toyota "Leyland" Yaris T Spirit (Three times)
2002 Mitsubishi Carisma DI-D (Blob)
2001 Rover 75 CDT Tourer (Clover)
2000 Rover 75 CDT Saloon
2000 Honda Accord SE Executive
1996 Citroën Xantia Dimension (Les Hamper des Bisquites)
1996 Volvo 940 SE Turbo Estate (Beeb)
1993 Citroën AX Neon (Les Tin des Bisquites)
1994 Volvo 850 SE Saloon
1989 Volvo 740 GLE Saloon
1988 Volvo 740 GL Saloon (Telly)




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