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Cavcraft's cavalcade of crap. Local honey.


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220 replies to this topic

#31 OFFLINE   The Reverend Bluejeans

The Reverend Bluejeans

    He's a right bastard.

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Posted 25 August 2014 - 07:03 AM

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Live update pissed from
The pub

 

1256 ALERT!


MASTER RACE MOTORS.

 

1989 F  730i. Prestigious.

1994 M 318Ti - Track whore

2008 Golf GTI 3dr 6spd #VAGWANKER

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Offended? Oh dear. What a shame. Piss off.

 

 


#32 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 13 September 2014 - 05:05 PM

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Tesco value car park find today.
  • Jim Bergerac, Sudsprint and chodweaver like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#33 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 17 September 2014 - 08:32 PM

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I'm sure I've seen the Volvo a couple of times when it was being used. I've also found a semi-abandoned 740 estate which I'll try and get a picture of at some point.
  • Shep Shepherd likes this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#34 OFFLINE   Split_Pin

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Posted 17 September 2014 - 09:07 PM

You've clearly been overenthusiastic whilst cycling and strayed into 'The Scotch'.
  • Cavcraft likes this

Audi 80 Cabrio  |  Renault Clio 172  |  Vauxhall Corsa B  |  Dacia Duster


#35 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 15 October 2014 - 11:49 AM

Live update as it happens:

image.jpg

Just to feebly attempt to show I'm not completely lazy, I went to take a picture of a very unused 740 estate for DA SVM CRU, but because I am completely lazy it's gone now.
  • cms206 and dugong like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#36 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 15 October 2014 - 01:26 PM

Sadly, for every action there's a reaction. Look at this mobile pile of fucking rubbish . Another pineapple bollocked 'individual' I expect.

image.jpg
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#37 OFFLINE   2MB

2MB

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Posted 15 October 2014 - 04:15 PM

Who in their right mind could be arsed finding and fitting such an array of mismatched panels and stickers? That thing woul look well with just the wheels and drop (if you like that kind of thing) for 10% of the effort

#38 OFFLINE   Hendry

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Posted 15 October 2014 - 04:43 PM

Who in their right mind could be arsed finding and fitting such an array of mismatched panels and stickers? That thing woul look well with just the wheels and drop (if you like that kind of thing) for 10% of the effort


Agreed, the deep dish steelies look good, the rest looks wank.
  • anonymous user likes this

Previous Car History:

97 R Vauxhall Astra 1.6 LS

02 51 Peugeot 206 1.4 LX

04 04 Renault Clio 1.2 Dynamique

98 S Hyundai Accent 1.3 Si Coupe

05 55 Vauxhall Corsa 1.4 SXi

02 52 Vauxhall Astra 1.6 Comfort

97 P Volkswagen Golf 1.4 SE

05 05 Vauxhall Astra 1.8 Design

09 59 Renault Clio 1.2 Dynamique

15 15 Vauxhall Corsa 1.4 SRi

09 09 Volkswagen Jetta 2.0 CR TDi Sport 140bhp (Current)


#39 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 21 October 2014 - 02:39 PM

Check out this local hero. I keep seeing it when I didn't have my copilot about to get a picture, until today.image.jpg
  • AnthonyG, Twiggy, HillmanImp and 10 others like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#40 OFFLINE   Station

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Posted 21 October 2014 - 02:50 PM

Where is that gold Astra estate located? I want to enquire on it's value from the owner, and then get told it is worth 1000 as it's a rare colour or something.



#41 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 21 October 2014 - 03:02 PM

VALUE: PRICELESS.

 

 

I think it belongs to one of the lads at a garage in Chester, will pm you the details.


"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#42 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 12:09 PM

Not Estafan Hunniford Laura Brannigan Gunner Beaumont


image.jpg

Here's how it would look on eBay:

image.jpg
  • Twiggy, cort16, HillmanImp and 5 others like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#43 OFFLINE   RoadworkUK

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Posted 22 October 2014 - 06:57 PM

Those are a terrific looking machine. Like an absolutely enormous version of a Lancia Fulvia.

 

Bear in mind I'm very drunk right now.


Come and visit Hooniverse! Pan-global Motoring News And Opinion

#44 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 28 October 2014 - 12:52 PM

DONT BAN THIS BOMB

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Matalan car park winner
  • cobblers, Skizzer, brickwall and 1 other like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#45 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 22 November 2014 - 10:54 AM

Just going to bomb every other spot EVER with this. Put your cameras away, MUTHAFLIPPAS, you won't get better than this...

 

 

calibraaaaaaa.JPG

 

 

 

Check it out, it's EVERYTHING a Calibra should be: Mega early, white, pre-facelift (should have a) BADGE ON THE BONNET with C20XE, yo!

 

 

*Obvs it's been mildly arsed about with, but it's still top of my want list. 


  • cobblers, Skizzer, John F and 1 other like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#46 ONLINE   Skizzer

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    Mae hen ceir fy nhadau yn annwyl i mi.

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Posted 22 November 2014 - 11:00 AM

Truly, the secret of happiness is to find the joy in small things ;-)

It is a very early one indeed, I'd forgotten these were old enough to be interesting.
  • scruff, Bamboocarman and Cavcraft like this
75N Vauxhall 2300S | 76P Lotus Elite | 76P Renault 16TL | 79T Rover 3500 | 82X Lancia Gamma Coupe | 82Y Jaguar XJ-S HE | 83A Jaguar Sovereign 4.2 | 84B Talbot-Matra Rancho | 85C Ford Granada 2.8 estate | 89G Honda Accord Aerodeck EX | 91H Audi 80 2.0E | 91J VW Golf Rivage cabrio | 06 Alfa Brera 2.2JTS | 14 BMW 428i | 18 Skoda Kodiaq

#47 OFFLINE   John F

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Posted 22 November 2014 - 12:30 PM

Meh. I've got one just like that sat on the drive, non-arsed about with, with a V6 in it :-)


  • Cavcraft likes this

Never knowingly under-ambitious

 

'99 Land Rover Discovery ES V8

'94 Vauxhall Calibra V6
'91 Maserati 222 SE

'88 Yamaha XJ900F

'86 Honda CBX 750F
'82 Suzuki GSX1100SZ Katana


#48 OFFLINE   Essex V6

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Posted 24 November 2014 - 09:15 AM

The out of town Halfords in Inverness was built for Daewoo sales, service, repairs. I blame GM for the demise of Halfords on the high street, the one in town was wound down not long after.


LP - I grew up about 10 miles from Inverness and can only vaguely remember a previous Halfrauds in the town - whereabouts was it?

#49 OFFLINE   Lacquer Peel

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Posted 24 November 2014 - 09:23 AM

It might have been on Union Street, I only vaguely remember it myself.

#50 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 24 November 2014 - 09:29 AM

The out of town one in Chester (or at least one of the out of town ones) was built before Daewoo came along. I think Halfords had it for servicing/repairs, which they sacked off and Daewoo moved in.

Then, weirdly, Halfords left that bit of the store empty, and took over another garage 1/5 mile away for it's servicing and repairs, then they moved out of that shop to a smaller one 1/4 mile away.


"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#51 OFFLINE   Tayne

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Posted 24 November 2014 - 10:41 AM

Just going to bomb every other spot EVER with this. Put your cameras away, MUTHAFLIPPAS, you won't get better than this...
 


I R DISSAPOINT BILLY!

Best spot of EVAH would be a line of cars waiting to pass an inconveniently parked truck (delivering combie boilers to the Apple Store) with the line consisting of D701SWL a-framing a Horsey Horseless, a dangly mirrored base spec 3 door Sierra in biege and a white povo spec diesel Talbot Tagora.

Your white Vauxhall (like all the rest) is shit.
  • cms206 and Cavcraft like this

It always amuses me that e46s vie with the PT Cruiser as the car that's too shit for Autoshite, 

 

 


#52 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 24 November 2014 - 11:55 AM

Esther-Rantzen--001.jpg

 

Over to you, Conrad...


  • cms206 likes this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#53 OFFLINE   Conrad D. Conelrad

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    Hello, Drug Merchant

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Posted 24 November 2014 - 07:31 PM

genuine-spot.jpg

 

I forgot the Sierra :(


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#54 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 24 November 2014 - 08:25 PM

AUTOSHITE CARTOONIST OF CHOICE 119.3/7


  • cms206, eddyramrod, rml2345 and 1 other like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#55 OFFLINE   Tayne

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Posted 24 November 2014 - 09:39 PM

I shall forgive the lack of Sierra owing to the presence of the Pornographic Tamagotchi Emporium and Bedford CA delivery van.
These two elements could improve all artwork...
  • AnthonyG, cms206, eddyramrod and 1 other like this

It always amuses me that e46s vie with the PT Cruiser as the car that's too shit for Autoshite, 

 

 


#56 OFFLINE   dugong

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Posted 25 November 2014 - 11:44 AM

PORNOGRAPHIC TAMOGOTCHI EMPORIUM would be a great name for a ska punk band. 


  • cms206 and Cavcraft like this

If your 1997 Fiesta is "Powered By Fairy Dust", why the fuck are you panic buying 60 litres of Diesel?


#57 OFFLINE   rml2345

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Posted 25 November 2014 - 12:07 PM

I dunno... It's no "Chunky Spaniel" or "Five High Flats and the Maisonettes"...
That Calibra looks mega appealing and would deffo benefit from being untwatted.
Current Wheels;
1994 Volvo 850 GLT Saloon (Twice)
1990 Volvo 740 GLE Estate
Previous Wheels;
2003 Peugeot 406 HDi Saloon
2003 Rover 75 CDT Connoisseur Saloon
2003 Toyota "Leyland" Yaris T Spirit (Three times)
2002 Mitsubishi Carisma DI-D (Blob)
2001 Rover 75 CDT Tourer (Clover)
2000 Rover 75 CDT Saloon
2000 Honda Accord SE Executive
1996 Citroën Xantia Dimension (Les Hamper des Bisquites)
1996 Volvo 940 SE Turbo Estate (Beeb)
1993 Citroën AX Neon (Les Tin des Bisquites)
1994 Volvo 850 SE Saloon
1989 Volvo 740 GLE Saloon
1988 Volvo 740 GL Saloon (Telly)

#58 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 22 February 2015 - 07:19 PM

image.jpg

image.jpg

That there London, this afternoon. Surely one of us?
  • eddyramrod, RobT and Sudsprint like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#59 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 22 February 2015 - 08:25 PM

Driver was sporting a flying jacket and smoking a BFO cigar...image.jpg
  • Squire_Dawson and Sudsprint like this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#60 OFFLINE   eddyramrod

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Posted 22 February 2015 - 08:53 PM

That R25 is the ex-panhard65 one that I was on the brink of buying a while back.


  • Cavcraft likes this

GLWTS everyone!

 

Fashion Victim: 2018 Suzuki SX (new wheelchair bus)

Huggy Bear: 1973 Cadillac Coupe de Ville - FOR SALE

Tripod: 2014 three-wheeled walker.  Temporary I hope!

Puglette: Peugeot pushbike, ladies' type

 

 

Mr ramrod is the nicest person in the world  (Chompy_snake, 2015)

Eddy is the finest fellow you will ever meet,  FACT (Djimbob, 2017)





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