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Guest Message by DevFuse
 

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Light blue touch paper, and stand well clear!


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11 replies to this topic

#1 OFFLINE   bigstraight6

bigstraight6

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 08:30 AM

Well, according to some newspapers this morning, from April next year you could well be receiving visits from Government sponsored door to door travel advisors, who will beret you if you use a Planet killing car and tender advice about how to ride a bicycle or get on a bus.Another monumental waste of tax payers money, the last thing I want after a long day come evening mealtime is some Transport 2000 agenda tree hugger at my door, they will be dispatched quicker than any double glazing salesman/God botherer :twisted:
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#2 OFFLINE   Mr Livered

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 08:56 AM

Thanks for the heads-up. I had better arrange the renewal of my shotgun licence without delay.

#3 OFFLINE   Cheggers

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 09:59 AM

Remind me to leave the Grand Cherokee on the drive...

#4 OFFLINE   j-j

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 06:07 PM

We can remind them that keeping shite on the road is a form of recycling 8)

Graeme M

 '93 Shitroen Xantia 1.9 TD VSX - 'Old Katy' and lots of shite bicycles and digital watches.


#5 OFFLINE   pogweasel

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 06:41 PM

Excellent!I look forward to their visit. I can show them my large collection of mainly immobile shite (0 miles, 0 carbon footprint!), my auto-body repairs made of reconstitued domestic packaging, my biodiesel refinery, and my pitiful attempts to recreate the idyllic lifestyle of Tom & Barbara Goode. I will enforce this point by locking the tree-hugging bike-tards in the duck house with the demonic ducks from hell. I am in two minds whether to (a) starve the ducks so that they turn feral and attempt to eat the lentil-eaters like some kind of deranged avian version of ALIVE, or (B) feed them up so that their already impressive ability to generate their own bodyweight in stinking faeces every half hour goes into apocalyptic overdrive. WELCOME TO ECO-HELL, MOTHERFUCKERS!

#6 OFFLINE   55bloke

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 07:09 PM

You DO have a splendid way with words Pog, and an equally splendid imagination!! :lol:

#7 OFFLINE   MrRegieRitmo

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 08:00 PM

I think him & Mr_Bo11ox should put their heads together and publish their best prose in a book. It could be called "Weasel like a bit of Bo11ox"

#8 OFFLINE   r.welfare

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    Lee 'Scratch' Perry

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 08:59 PM

Sounds like the title of a Blue Movie. But I agree, cracking encapsulation Pog.

2003 Renault Espace IV 2.0 petrol - living up to its reputation...


#9 OFFLINE   KruJoe

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    Joe Cleland

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Posted 31 October 2007 - 11:56 PM

Agreed - both wordsmiths of the highest degree.

#10 OFFLINE   Marty

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Posted 01 November 2007 - 02:12 PM

Lock em in the composting toilet is what I say.

Man from the Ministry: Why dont you take the bus to work?

Fat Bastard: Because in order to get to work I would have to leave at 5am, change busses 4 times, lugging 2 suitcases of case notes, prescriptions, some medical equipment and also a gross of assorted fruit flavoured condoms. Next stupid question please?

Man from the Ministry
: Will you stop hitting me over the head with that old exhaust pipe please?

Fat Basket: No

#11 OFFLINE   pogweasel

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Posted 02 November 2007 - 07:51 PM


Fat Bastard: Because in order to get to work I would have to leave at 5am, change busses 4 times, lugging 2 suitcases of case notes, prescriptions, some medical equipment and also a gross of assorted fruit flavoured condoms. Next stupid question please?

Hey, it's do-able.
Today, I managed to lug about 40kgs of awkward bastard kit round several worksites on me tod via the tube & some sweaty, angry footpower (yeah, dressing for november was a bad move. Thick coat + springlike temps + kit = OMGz!).
My feet and knees ache like a bastard and my arms will never be the same (length) again.
A VAN! A VAN! MY KINGDOM FOR A VAN!!!

#12 OFFLINE   marinast

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Posted 02 November 2007 - 08:08 PM

I'd point out that my non moving classics produce less CO2 than the breathing inspector.Now, if he stopped breathing.... :roll:
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British Leyland, Built to Last a Thousand Years




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