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The Parking Thread


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#241 OFFLINE   AngusToledo

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Posted 16 March 2017 - 06:09 PM

Not strictly bad parking related but this is my new favourite facebook page / youtbe channel:
 
https://youtu.be/pdKpYKTf7YM


I really enjoyed that. Some of those grade A bellend drivers need to put their mouth shut!

2B04539A00000578-0-image-a-87_1438444324
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#242 OFFLINE   Hooli

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Posted 16 March 2017 - 08:13 PM

I've not seen that for years :D


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#243 OFFLINE   TataBobu

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 11:49 AM

What's that green Barried thing in the background?

 

Looks like a Hyundai Coupe.



#244 OFFLINE   red5

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 12:27 PM

I'll have a look tonight on way home.


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#245 OFFLINE   Captain Furious

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 12:38 PM

Another bellend dashcam owner here (two infact, front and rear). Unfortunately, in these times of crash for cash, hit and runs, generally unscrupulous behaviour by less than fine upstanding individuals, I feel it necessary to protect my own interests.  I would never forgive myself if some cunt did a crash for cash on me and I didn't have the necessary evidence to fuck over his claim.

 

RE the parking thing, parking over two spaces gets royally on my nerves, but then, even in car parks with small spaces its not exactly difficult to get out of your car without damaging the one next to you.  So I feel they're the ones who really need the kicking, for making twatty parking necessary in the first place.


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#246 OFFLINE   DodgeRover

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Posted 21 March 2017 - 08:44 PM

I was working near a station on a rural rd where smart cars seemed to be the vehicle of choice, one owner persisted in slotting it into gaps between other cars but parking front in rather than in parallel.
Obviously this must have miffed several somebodies because as I was going passed one day there had been a shuffle about leaving them a gap of about an inch at each side for them to open their door in.....
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#247 OFFLINE   BenHar

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Posted 20 April 2017 - 08:56 PM

4X80lqI.jpg

 

Ben


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CHRIS1980, on 08 Jan 2016 - 8:37 PM, said:snapback.png

Your clearly thick....end of.


#248 ONLINE   gadgetgricey

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Posted 20 April 2017 - 09:14 PM

http://i.imgur.com/4X80lqI.jpg...
 
Ben


He's not used to the size yet, the 106 would have fitted lovely.....
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#249 OFFLINE   RayMK

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Posted 20 April 2017 - 09:26 PM

 

 

Ben

 

These free style parkers have such important business that they have not got time to park properly.  Their other favourite trick is to park on the marked crossings near supermarket store entrances whilst they *quickly try several cards in the cashpoint before going off in a huff.  



#250 OFFLINE   mercrocker

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Posted 22 April 2017 - 10:19 AM

Had a great one yesterday, parked in approx 50ft bay busy shopping street, one of those "1 hour" jobs actually cut into the wide pavement so it is off the road lanes.   LWB Tranny van at the back, nice and tight to the kerb, myself just in front of him in our T25.   It left about 8ft in front of me but the front of the layby was not square, it was angled.  

 

Basically you could just have put a motorcycle in there.... 

 

Along comes orange-face in her X-Trail, council face-lift hairdo and ear-rings like the aerial on my nan's old portable telly....  

 

Bear in mind I am at this point, 2 up in the van, indicating to pull out, on full lock and engine running.  She crashes over the pavement, drops down into the bay and tries to leave the Nissan about 4mm from my front bumper with its arse out in the road, Cashpoint Parking Light (hazards) going and gets out, flaps about with her handbag and locks the car. 

 

Mrs Rocker winds down her side window and gently informs Ms X-Trail that we are Going.   It was worth the slight delay to see her have to flap her handbag, find the remote, get back in and reverse out over a payment across an oncoming traffic flow she couldn't possibly see (I kept an eye on that myself, partly because I am considerate and partly because I didn't want any resultant explosion of plastic shattering alongside my van). 

 

Now, either she was fucking blind or just an inconsiderate pig.  Or both.  Either way, the onset maturity of not throwing a wobbler like I would once have done wound her up far more than it did me.  Or Mrs Rocker, who learned some nice new Jeremey Kyle show phrases.


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#251 OFFLINE   eddyramrod

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Posted 22 April 2017 - 01:00 PM

I should have had the presence of mind to take a photo this morning...

Behind our bakery shop in Barrow town centre is a communal delivery yard, with pedestrian access at several points.  People therefore use it as unlimited free parking while they go to the shops/for a coffee/for a night out.  The surface of the yard is littered with LOADING ONLY in six-foot white capitals, and all around the edges are signs reinforcing the message.  Our local traffic wardens are pretty good, and will ignore vans doing actual deliveries while pouncing on (inevitably) Audis and BMWs abandoned in the middle of the yard.  The middle of the yard is a big open space for a reason: artics turn in it. 

This morning there was a silver 1-series, bang in the middle, precisely ON the lettering.  It had clearly been there all night, which makes a bit of sense if you've had a few drinks and don't want to drive home.  However, Mr 1-series really should have applied brain a couple of hours earlier and left the car at home, then he wouldn't have got a ticket this morning.

You'd think some van drivers have nothing better to do than go collaring wardens...


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#252 OFFLINE   mercrocker

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Posted 22 April 2017 - 01:37 PM

End of our street goes into a T junction onto a major road.   There are shops each side about 50 yards from the Give Way signs, these have parallel parking bays each side but leave enough road width for ample two way traffic.   There is a goods yard behind the left-hand flank of shops, again like Eddy's example, mainly for artics to turn and other goods vehicles to deliver.   

 

Unfortunately they have long since given up trying to do so as the single access road to the area is rammed with pavement-parking twats and there is never a warden around to sort them out.   Hence lorries now drive past the shops from the major road end and do their drops in a one-way side road which is a complete ball-ache for everybody.   On top of that, the council decided to multi-colour the road surface in slabs of pinkish grey, black and concrete.   This gives pedestrians the illusion that they can wander freely out between parked cars as long as they are on the "right" colour.  

 

On top of all this you get four-way flashing knobheads suddenly stopping in front of you in case the bloke in the Fiesta next to the betting shop is actually going to drive off and leave them a parking space.   Riding a bike past this parade of door-opening, U-turning wretches clutching Subway bags, estate agent folders and Vape supplies is like surfing on a radio-active shark-infested tsunami.      

 

Someone will get hurt there one day but all the council do is put more street furniture up to confuse pedestrians and clutter the view. 

 

The most galling part of the whole place (which I have to drive, ride or walk by in order to eat, work or post a parcel) is that there is a 140 space FREE car park less than 45 seconds walk around the corner.   I think fuel may soon have to be rationed, governed by use of a Fitbit.....


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#253 OFFLINE   BenHar

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Posted 22 April 2017 - 10:32 PM

C-DHAcRXoAA8K5B.jpg

 

Ben


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CHRIS1980, on 08 Jan 2016 - 8:37 PM, said:snapback.png

Your clearly thick....end of.


#254 ONLINE   paulplom

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Posted 23 April 2017 - 03:30 AM

Outside my house yesterday morning. I live next door to a pub. They were obviously over the limit when they abandoned it.7591570509d2d6aca0348ceb1170eab8.jpg

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#255 ONLINE   Eddie Honda

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Posted 23 April 2017 - 06:59 AM

That's quite well parked if it was. Parallel to something is good!
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#256 OFFLINE   Hooli

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Posted 23 April 2017 - 08:31 AM

Outside my house yesterday morning. I live next door to a pub. They were obviously over the limit when they abandoned it.https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/2017042...

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I like cars like that, I park my bike between them & the kerb.


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#257 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 01 August 2017 - 02:17 PM

IMG_20170801_150450.jpg

 

See that gate there? Oh, it's nothing important, just access to all the back gardens for my entire street.

 

Cunt.

 

But... what do I expect from the sort of person who goes out and purposely chooses a resale silver Vauxhall Mokka as their mode of transport? Awareness of their surroundings? Really? I mean, yes, the gate isn't signposted or anything, but I imagine most people understand the basic concept of a gate. You know, a means of entry or exit from another place. Kind of makes sense to not park right in front of it.


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#258 OFFLINE   andy18s

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Posted 01 August 2017 - 06:57 PM

does it happen to open outerward by any chance?
2x Vivaro vans.....for now amyway

#259 OFFLINE   mercrocker

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Posted 01 August 2017 - 07:32 PM

Mine do.   Four times now I have had to ask, politely, the fat bint who leaves her C3 across them to NOT block my gates otherwise I shall eventually get very fucking annoyed at 5AM and be banging on the door for her to move the shit.    

 

Wouldn't mind so much but she doesn't even fucking live here, just rides the bones of a nipper over the road.   I thought she was being a bit awkward at first but I have come to the conclusion she is just fucking thick.   They have a driveway, a garage, a front forecourt big enough for the C3 thing and a parking space outside the house.   Only one of those options ever gets used, the rest of their cronk gets left in everybody else's way.     There seems to be no responsibility attached to vehicle ownership any more....


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#260 OFFLINE   myglaren

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Posted 01 August 2017 - 07:34 PM

attachicon.gifIMG_20170801_150450.jpg

 

See that gate there? Oh, it's nothing important, just access to all the back gardens for my entire street.

 

Cunt.

 

But... what do I expect from the sort of person who goes out and purposely chooses a resale silver Vauxhall Mokka as their mode of transport? Awareness of their surroundings? Really? I mean, yes, the gate isn't signposted or anything, but I imagine most people understand the basic concept of a gate. You know, a means of entry or exit from another place. Kind of makes sense to not park right in front of it.

Let the tyres down!


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#261 OFFLINE   MikeR

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Posted 01 August 2017 - 07:50 PM

when you come out of the supermarket with a trolley full of shite and some brown noser has praticed what he preaches to your car .... yes that is a towbar on the back

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#262 OFFLINE   red5

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Posted 01 August 2017 - 09:44 PM

Parking.jpg


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1995 2.8 Fronterror LWB

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Living the dream.

 

 

 


#263 OFFLINE   red5

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Posted 01 August 2017 - 09:46 PM

Parking2.jpg


1995 2.8 Fronterror LWB

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Living the dream.

 

 

 


#264 OFFLINE   red5

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Posted 01 August 2017 - 09:48 PM

Parking3.jpg

 

Parking4.jpg

 

Parking5.jpg

 

....


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1995 2.8 Fronterror LWB

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Living the dream.

 

 

 


#265 OFFLINE   HH-R

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Posted 02 August 2017 - 07:34 AM

My local ASDA has those hashed areas on the end of the rows in a triangular shape because the car park narrows towards the shop.

 

There's always some lazy bastard parked in them, I always want to ask these people if they find it annoying having to pull out blind because some ignorant wanker can't be bothered to walk another ten yards.


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#266 ONLINE   Richard

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Posted 02 August 2017 - 11:55 AM

I had to reverse into the wrong end of the petrol station this morning because two people had parked side by side in the entrance. They weren't even using the petrol station, they were swapping drivers or something. They didn't seem to be in any hurry and when they eventually left they both reversed onto the busy road with no regard for traffic. There was no reason why they couldn't stop on the street to do whatever they were doing. Shower of axe wounds.

 

Autopoint.jpg


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#267 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 07 August 2017 - 09:48 AM


IMG_20170807_103407.jpg

Nice one, Tesco. Not entirely sure why you're delivering to an office building on a university campus, but that's simply outstanding work parking on a hashed-out area and blocking the wheelchair ramp into the building. The van was switched off and no sign of the driver either.

#268 OFFLINE   Negative Creep

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Posted 07 August 2017 - 10:01 AM

This muppet parked his lorry over a pedestrian crossing whilst he sat there and took a phone call
 
tp7wzQ6s.png
 

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#269 OFFLINE   adw1977

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Posted 11 August 2017 - 08:18 PM

Also pedestrian crossing related, do I see your front wheels on the zig zags, officer?  Very naughty!

 

IMG_1714.JPG


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#270 OFFLINE   PiperCub

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Posted 11 August 2017 - 08:35 PM

attachicon.gifIMG_20170801_150450.jpg

 

See that gate there? Oh, it's nothing important, just access to all the back gardens for my entire street.

 

Cunt.

 

But... what do I expect from the sort of person who goes out and purposely chooses a resale silver Vauxhall Mokka as their mode of transport? Awareness of their surroundings? Really? I mean, yes, the gate isn't signposted or anything, but I imagine most people understand the basic concept of a gate. You know, a means of entry or exit from another place. Kind of makes sense to not park right in front of it.

 

This is a great example of where you can call the cops and state the vehicle is blocking the emergency access to the rear of the houses - and get it towed and impounded. A friend did this to a local arrogant smug cow who used to dump her Merc in a similar place because she was too lazy to walk 30m more to the shops.

 

He & his neighbours had asked her numerous times (politely) but received  a mouthful of 'I don't have to listen to the likes of you' etc. so they got it lifted and impounded. The aftermath was apparently hilarious with said smug cow having a full-on meltdown tantrum in the street, actually swinging for a WPC that showed up to find out hat the fuss was and ended with her getting arrested (he doesn't know if she was actually charged or anything).

 

She never parked there again! Lesson learned? Let's hope so. 


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