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A shameless 'cars and girls' thread (contains sexism)


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#1 OFFLINE   barrett

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 04:48 PM

I know there was one of these before, but unforgivably it fell rapidly off the first page and into obscurity some time ago. You should be ashamed of yourselves.

Lots of these have been nicked from the amazing Autorama70 blog, plus a few other places around the web. I've re-sized and re-hosted them for optimised viewing.

(Apologies in advance, this turned out to be a lot more offensive/ less funny that I planned. SORRY)


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Such a wonderfully curvy shape, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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Quite a chilly scene here, not to worry though as I'm quite 'hot under the collar' from looking at this image. AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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The gentle autumnal colours really set off those typically '70s lines, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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I'd like to get myself comfortable in the interior of this, enjoying all the tactile surfaces to hand, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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I'd love to get in all the nooks and crannies of this with a waxoil Gun to protect it from rotting away from the inside out, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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I bet most of these were owned by the government and passed around various mid-level employees until they got worn out from use, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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These things get better and better with age, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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Imagine how long it would take to wash all the sand from the inside of this. AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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Oh yeah, I'd like to 'be alone' with this in the woods for a few hours, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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Imagine getting right in there and rearranging those boxes, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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I'd love to have one of these locked up in my garage, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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Looks great but notoriously slow and dull, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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Later moved to Romania and got a couple of cheap facelifts, finally dying a bloated caricature of itself IN THE LATE '90S, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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This whole thing really seemed a lot funnier in my head. Oh well, too late to stop now. AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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I'm not sure I could ever commit to the level of upkeep needed to maintain one of these, but I find it incredibly arousing to look at, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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Nice tits. AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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I would quite literally have sex with this, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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It's a shame I don't have anything like this of my own, instead I have to sit here staring longingly at pictures, gradually working myself up into a frenzy before exploding all over myself, leaving only a deep feeling of guilt and loneliness, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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Stunning, what a shame the plastic body is liable to cracks and crazing over time, AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER! (Yes, that IS Britt Ekland in a Shapecraft Elan coupe :o )

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Looks nice here, but probably ended up in the hands of some oafish boy-racer and covered with unnecessary 'bling' a few years later. AND THE CAR ISN'T BAD EITHER!

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er.... something about "caressing my helmet"?
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1992 Citroen BX TZD Break

#2 OFFLINE   privatewire

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 04:56 PM

Quality! :lol:
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#3 ONLINE   Mr_Bo11ox

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 05:38 PM

Now that is what i call a quality thread!!!

PIGEONZ NEST

CHECK OUT MY AWARD-WINNING SHITE-FIXING BLOG HERE

"THE 2.3 POWERTRAIN IS A SILENT IS AS A FISH, AND IT PULLS LIKE A GREAT"
"The engine has airbrushed skulls on it"

"Car shows are full of mentals talking tosh"


#4 OFFLINE   trigger

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 06:21 PM

Now that's a proper thread!
1971 Rover 2000 SC P6 with a 2200 SC fitted.
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#5 OFFLINE   HillmanImp

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 06:33 PM

This is one of the best things I have seen for ages. AND THE CARS AREN'T BAD EITHER!
1965 Singer Chamois
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#6 OFFLINE   freebird

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 06:36 PM

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#7 OFFLINE   mk1_4dr

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 06:40 PM

Shi-tastic

Really though, QUAL thread.

Now Im going to spend the night scouring the internet on works time for wholly inappropriate pictures...
'74 EscRot.
'96 940 2.3s

#8 OFFLINE   tonedepear

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 06:58 PM

I genuinely literally choked on my brew reading that. I'm not sure that's ever actually happened before. Good work!

My life in shite : http://mingebagcitroens.blogspot.com/
"Moaty, It's Gazza!" : http://www.moto-scat.com

1998 MGF now in France
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429649.png534561.png555505.png


#9 OFFLINE   Pillock

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 07:44 PM

I got as far as the Waxoil comment before literally* chortling a lung up :D

Since it's a TOP THREAD, I'll attempt to contribute.

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I saved the mst PHWOARsome till last:
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#10 OFFLINE   gallondrunk

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 08:05 PM

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A Mustang II as well, for added misery.

#11 OFFLINE   pbottomley

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 08:10 PM

Is it me or is this a midget ? or the 2CV is a supersized version we have yet to discover?

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#12 OFFLINE   HillmanImp

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 08:14 PM

Is it me or is this a midget ?


I have never met you so cant comment on whether or not you are a midget...... :wink:

However I see what you mean.
1965 Singer Chamois
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1987 Citroen Visa 10e
1989 Toyota MR2
1998 Jaguar XJ8 Sport

#13 OFFLINE   pbottomley

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 08:16 PM

Is it me or is this a midget ?


I have never met you so cant comment on whether or not you are a midget...... :wink:

However I see what you mean.


Only at weekends :wink:

 


#14 ONLINE   Mr_Bo11ox

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 08:19 PM

Its a child innit

PIGEONZ NEST

CHECK OUT MY AWARD-WINNING SHITE-FIXING BLOG HERE

"THE 2.3 POWERTRAIN IS A SILENT IS AS A FISH, AND IT PULLS LIKE A GREAT"
"The engine has airbrushed skulls on it"

"Car shows are full of mentals talking tosh"


#15 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 09:22 PM

Barrett (once again) on top form.

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And check this out!

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"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"


#16 OFFLINE   Negative Creep

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 09:31 PM

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I would really like to have intercourse with this woman in both her vagina and anus. AND THE CAR'S NOT BAD EITHER!



Am I doing this right?
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2002 Honda Civic


#17 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 09:41 PM

No, you forgot mouth.

6/11, must do better.

"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"


#18 OFFLINE   mk1_4dr

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 09:46 PM

To be fair, if it was a choice between a night with the mexican hooker on the bonnet or a long meaningful relationship with the Galaxie, id be reaching for the keys to the Ford.

She does have cracking pins though....
'74 EscRot.
'96 940 2.3s

#19 OFFLINE   eddyramrod

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 09:55 PM

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I'm frankly amazed we've got this deep into a Cars-and-Girls thread without the lovely* Marina!
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#20 OFFLINE   barrett

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 11:12 PM

I love how Marina looks TINY in that photo. Also, that appears to be taken from an ebay listing for a magazine that someone is selling solely on the strength that it contains an article about Marina? That is fuggin' mind boggling.

Anyway, I can deffo confirm that the lass with the 2cv isn't a midget or a child, she just loves leaning on things. Probably a weak spine.
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She's got a mate too
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I know this photo has been posted here before and every time I see it I make the same comment, but I find this genuinely hilarious (and sexy). This young lady is adjusting the delicate carb set-up on her Abarth with a massive fuck-off wooden screwdriver. Amazing.
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That's part of a set...
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I like this one 'cause somebody's gone to the trouble of writing a joke already. Cashback!
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Ditto this one, which is titled 'Francoise Hardy in Ferrari'. I just love the bluntness of that. Not exactly shite, but check out the Neckar-Fiat Weinsburg & 'bathtub' Taunus in the background
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Feel free to insert your own comment about cheap plasticy Japanese cars here
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1929 Ford Model A (half)
1938-ish / 1967-ish Heron Austin special (half)
1965 Peugeot 404 Cabriolet (half)
1981 Austin Allegro 1.3 (half)
1986 Citroen BX 16RS Break
1992 Citroen BX TZD
1992 Citroen BX TXD (Autoshite bike)
1992 Citroen BX TZD Break

#21 Guest__*

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Posted 24 April 2012 - 11:24 PM

Hilarious. AND THE THREAD'S NOT BAD EITHER!

:D

Post more Barrett, the interweb e minge is moist for it.

#22 OFFLINE   Captain Mainwaring

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 06:33 AM

KWALITY THRED M8.

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I have seen this photo many, many times and I still have no fucking idea what it's all about.
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I'M ONLY SPEEDING 'COS I NEED A POO LOL


#23 OFFLINE   Lacy

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 08:32 AM

http://www.fordpedia.org/wp-content/uplo...

I would really like to have intercourse with this woman in both her vagina and anus. AND THE CAR'S NOT BAD EITHER!



Am I doing this right?


Funniest comment of eva.............

#24 OFFLINE   Pillock

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 09:28 AM

A day off work? Access to the internet? Oh, go on then.

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I'll get you started with a massive crank.... ATCNBE!

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Just the way I like them, totally bare apart from a stripe up the middle. ATCNBE!

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Brilliant, something you can legally ride at 16, although your mates will take the piss because it's a bit old, and it'll probably have a breakdown followed by stuff leaking out of it. AT(M)NBE!

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Needs to be in really tight otherwise it'll fall out at speed and make a mess. ATCNBE!

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Weird front end, looks like it'd be loads of hassle and expense in the long run. ATCNBE!

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Cheap executive ride. ATCNBE!

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I haven't got a fugging clue. And the car's shit.
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#25 OFFLINE   pbottomley

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 10:36 AM

Right that my head total confused now! in one image the 2CV is twenty foot high and in another its 2 foot high.... either that or this bird is a midget and sometimes stilts? I do agree however she seems to have a back problem :lol: :lol:

Shes a midget
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Shes a giant
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#26 OFFLINE   michiel

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 10:56 AM

The Dutch don't do sexy.

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Apologies on behalf of the Dutch. The Dutch don't dance either.

#27 OFFLINE   DSdriver

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 11:06 AM

One of my favourite pics
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I think she has a headlight problem... and maybe the car as well.
JohnF said:
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But I just love the fact that they exist."

#28 OFFLINE   Jack_Harpers_Teeth

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 11:08 AM

Right that my head total confused now! in one image the 2CV is twenty foot high and in another its 2 foot high.... either that or this bird is a midget and sometimes stilts? I do agree however she seems to have a back problem :lol::lol:

Shes a midget
http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d28/ba...

Shes a giant
http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d28/ba...


Buggered if I can work it out either?

Cosmopolitan Woman with Dolomite;

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West Midlands man with Dolomite;

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#29 OFFLINE   trigger

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 02:25 PM

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1957-1959 BMW 600 by Austin7nut, on Flickr

Small and agile with a opening front for easy access. AND THE CAR'S NOT BAD EITHER!

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Untitled by Csókási Richárd, on Flickr

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Untitled by Csókási Richárd, on Flickr

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MGB Roadster Advert 1973 by Trigger's Retro Road Tests!, on Flickr

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1971 Rover 2000 SC P6 with a 2200 SC fitted.
1979 Triumph Dolomite 1500 SE
2004 Ford Fiesta 1.4 TDCi Zetec

#30 OFFLINE   barrett

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Posted 25 April 2012 - 02:38 PM

Whoever was doing Audi's marketing in the early '70s had some seriously good taste. Oh, to be a fly on the wall during those casting sessions.

Right, here's a challenge, can anyone find a decently sized shot from the same NSU RO80 shoot as the one I posted on page one where the lass has 'RO 80' written on her stomach. I have spent an embarrassingly long time trying to find it on the internet to no avail.

As a sort of preemptive reward, here is a SUPASIZED version of "autoshite's most popular avatar 2011"
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1929 Ford Model A (half)
1938-ish / 1967-ish Heron Austin special (half)
1965 Peugeot 404 Cabriolet (half)
1981 Austin Allegro 1.3 (half)
1986 Citroen BX 16RS Break
1992 Citroen BX TZD
1992 Citroen BX TXD (Autoshite bike)
1992 Citroen BX TZD Break




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    rantingYoof