jakebullet

Not if you get your bezzie m8 to stick it on his trade policy. Works great until she stacks it, or it's routine stopped and they realise she's not the hairy arsed bloke who's insured it.

Cunts next door are attempting to piss off the maximum number of people possible with top quality* parking. After Mrs. Cunt got a nice visit from the 5-0 she stopped parking touching Hazel's car, which was a win for a while. However, this weekend Hazel has Mr. Cunt's pikey tipper touching her bumper, so she's less than happy. The £30,000 cat S disco 4 is now parked a bit further up, in such a position that the next 2 houses to Hazel struggle to get past the bastard to get off their drives. So that's 3 annoyed on the other side of the street. But wait, there's more! Pikey tipper is in the street because round the back there's pikey tipper #2 appeared. This is a kicked to fuck example that is SORN, no insurance, and crucially is parked badly so it's going to block access for 7 more houses to get out. Mrs. Cunt isn't capable of driving manual cars, so that's 7 who's going to find getting to work a soupcon difficult in the morning. Assuming he's not going to be driving that one around illegally of course. Yes, I know I'm just green with envy that I don't own 2 shit pikey tippers and a written off disco 4.

Fairly sure there was plenty of addiction but only at low stakes. They are just constantly trying to get money out of you every minute you're in there. £20 for books, then every second between pages it's put a quid in the slot for the table game. Plus RTP is 50% so you have no hope of getting lucky in the long term. The way out goes thru slot machines where they're shovelling £20 notes in the slot. I feel so happy that I've clawed back £3000 profit from mecca by abusing their offers online. They really are the evil empire.

I've seen the ugly side of gambling today. It's mecca fucking bingo. Take this email for free bingo, drink, and burger for you and a friend worth £50. It could be good for a giggle on a boring Sunday afternoon? WRONG. It's just depressing. The grannies desperately donking their pension away. The queue for the bar where everyone asks for a 4 pint jug of carling and 1 glass, n they look at you like you have done a shit on the carpet when you ask for a cappuccino. Terrible songs* that have the music from popular songs but words extolling the virtues of bingo. Plus Mrs has broken a tooth n won nowt to pay for it.

Mrs's block of flats is turning into a crime zone. Attempted robbery today of the sainsburys van. Bit* extreme fighting with the driver for random bags of shopping.

Not exactly grin, more like fucking hell it wasn't me for a change. Getting in the c1 at Mrs's and the next car to me has peeps doing the looking glum thing. Has someone hit your car? Yes. Hang on, I'll have a look on the dashcam and see if it got anything. Turns out it's police interceptors tiem. A disco flies round the corner with cops behind it. 3 scallies jump out like the A team and disco sails on clonk into car parked after me. You would have thought cops would have contacted crashed into owner but they just recover the disco and bugger off. Looks like they got 1 out of 3 scallies.

Ha ha, I left out the other sister thing today as being too fantastical. She's started another miracle diet, I think it's one of those where you have like 800 calories a day in packet soup etc, and starve yourself thin. While giving them £70 a week for food* supplies. So it's day 3, are we by any chance going near Staniforths? Well no, wasn't planning on it. Why? Surprise, we are going there, her diet needs a fuck off cream cake. But it's ok, the diet is based on ketones as well as 800 calories, so cakes are in.

Ma keeps complaining the milk is going off cos shit milk from that shop. Hmm. One quick measure of the fridge temperature suggests it may* be related to fridge being set at 12 degrees. So I turned it up a bit. Next day she's chuntering about the carrots being cold so I may have gone a smidge too far. Bit hard to tell cos she's turned it back down. Now on day 3 of "this has been ruined because you've frozen it". Oh do fuck off mother dear. Put it all in the fucking bin, I'll take you to monkey spunks and you can restock the bastard with stuff thats guaranteed not to go off at 12 degrees. Bonus grump of idiot sister texts Ma, am I putting any bets on the grand national? Maybe I am, but not for her. Get her own account and place her own bets. Why am I being like that???? Well, could be something to do with if she wins she wants paying out and if she loses she accidentally forgets to pay for the stake.

Rev counter, down force generator, colour coded mirrors. You haz super high* spec one! Aircon?

Random email, Claim a £50 amazon voucher as thanks for completing our survey. Yeah, right. Going for the delete button, when I spot it says Dear real name. Hmmmm. Copied the claim code, went direct to amazon's real site and it works. Get in! Bit of working out who's survey it was, turned out to be mecca bingo

I'm not that bothered by the cunts now the aircon is gone. Just get her swearing at her kids drifting thru the wall. I've ordered myself an electric guitar and am on the lookout for a fuck off sized amp. As I have no musical talent whatsoever they're going to love to join me on my learning journey.

I'll pass on suggestions to Hazel. She's had a visit from Mr. cunt now, saying please park somewhere else. Mrs. cunt's car cost 30K, and Mrs. cunt must be able to see it at all times for insurance purposes. £30K for a cat S 2010 disco. Riiiiiiiight.

Hazel's daughter went to have a quiet* word with Mrs Cunt only to get a barrage of abuse, and to be told Cunt is phoning the police right now as daughter is trespassing on her property, and the police will also be arresting Hazel because she's illegally stopping cunt from parking where she wants to. Clearly cunt has been on the special drugs today. Vendetta is already in full swing, as cunt has previously asserted her rights* to the space. No doubt it's her placing bottles & nails under Hazel's car wheels. Hazel going to get a ring doorbell, though not sure if having evidence will actually help.

My delightful* neighbour Mrs. CUNT has been out screaming in the street at the old lady who lives opposite cunt. Cunt has decided the space in front of Hazel's house is her "reserved" space, for parking of her chav mobile only. She is extra special, and cannot possibly walk an extra 3 yards if she parks behind Hazel's car. Hazel is unsurprisingly upset at being called a fucking old twat, and being threatened with getting her fucking teeth kicked in if she parks there. Any top tips, other than a sponsored set fire to chavved up disco day?